


Kitty Cats

by life_is_righteous



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Cat!Thorin, Cats, Characters as Cats, Everyone lives, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Line of Durin as cats, Nobody Dies, Some angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-01-20 15:11:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 23,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12435417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/life_is_righteous/pseuds/life_is_righteous
Summary: You and your son, Frerin II, accidentally turn Thorin, Kili, Fili, Dwalin, Balin and Gandalf into cats and this is the result (Spin off of The Elf and The Dwarf).A/n: This is a spin off of a series that I have not yet posted on AO3, but it is on Tumblr but just in case you don’t want to read it here’s a general gist:-Reader is a half-elf, half-human who was raised by Lord Elrond, but is actually Thranduil’s daughter.-She accompanied Thorin on his quest as is currently married to him with a son who looks exactly like Thorin but with his mother’s height and ears.-TA 2960





	1. Day One: pt. 1

The house was absolutely silent, which you were grateful for. Frerin II, your son, was out with his cousins. You were a bit iffy given the fact that they were Fili and Kili. You knew what those two typically got up to, you were on the receiving end of it many times, but Fili had promised to watch over him carefully and not to teach him anything bad. That part you didn’t believe. At all. Fili, by himself, you trusted, but with Kili. You didn’t at all.

You were pretty sure that Kili had thought Frerin how to give you the puppy dog eyes to get what he wanted. He was only four when he learned how to wrap you around his fingers. You had sent the two brothers in the corner for that and you had almost fallen for Kili’s puppy dog eyes. Almost. Thorin was there to set him straight.

You sigh as the door slams open. Frerin had the habit of slamming every door he came across. He was pretty strong for a 15 year old because those door were made out of stone and Thorin himself could barely slam the door. You supposed that’s what you get when your son is part elf, part man, and part human. All the wonders of the world.

You pause waiting for the door to slam shut, but you raise your eyebrow when it does not. You hear the lock click and you decide to leave the kitchen to see exactly what he was up to. He had to be sneaking something inside.

You see him walking down the hall and it looks like he’s trying to be as quiet as possible.

“What are you doing?”

Frerin freezes in his steps but does not turn to you.

“Nothing?” he asks and you narrow your eyes.

He seems to be holding something in front of him. Something that he was hiding.

“Oh? What’s that in your hands then?” you ask, moving closer. He slumps as you finally catch a glimpse of what he had in his hands.

It was a cat. A somewhat old, Maine Coon cat. It’s entire body was covered in brown and white fur, but on it’s head there were gray streaks. It’s blue eyes reminded you a bit of Thorin. It was piercing and you were immediately captivated by it.

“Who is this little guy?” you ask, fingers reaching out to scratch its head.

The cat leans into your touch and you hear a meow, but it was not from the one currently cuddling into your hand.

You back away from your son as you notice four other cats popping out of his coat.

One looked like a very old, gray tabby. The other two cats were quite young, as if just coming out of their kitten stages. One was a white, norwegian cat and the other was a black norwegian cat. The last looked like a very grumpy gray Ragdoll. This one kind of remind you of Gandalf

You pick up the two Norwegian cats and they immediately climb onto your shoulders, licking your cheeks. You giggle as it tickles.

“What are you doing with five cats? Your father is going to be absolutely furious,” you say, trying to keep still so you won’t jostle the cats, but they’re just perching on your shoulders as if waiting for Frerin to explain something.

Thorin was not fond of animals in general unless they were ponies or ravens. Something that was useful to him. That, however, didn’t stop you from being home stray animals for the few hours that Thorin was busy. All you did was give them a bath and a meal. It wasn’t like it was anything major.

“Uh well. You see. I thought these cats looked adad, cousin Fili, cousin Fili, Mr. Balin and Mr. Gandalf so I thought I’d show them,” Frerin says and you narrow your eyes at him.

“You’re lying.”

“Am not!” he exclaims, making the cat in his hand hiss and scratch him. He winces.

“Okay. This is actually adad, fili, kili, balin and Gandalf,” he says and you just give him a blank look before laughing your ass off.

Your husband? Is a cat? What a joke!

“Fili and Kili have been teaching you too much. I should put them in a corner again!” you say and that causes the black cat to jump onto Frerin and it goes onto his back and watches you from the tip of frerin’s shoulder. IT was like he was scared of you or something.

“No. Seriously amad! Kili and I were hiding behind the throne and Gandalf was there and I just wanted to touch his staff and suddenly pure me smoke was coming out of it and they were all turned into cats!” Frerin exclaims, tears of frustration clouding his eyes.

“Hey. It’s okay. We’ll figure it out alright?” you ask, cupping his cheek in your hands and he nods a tear making an escape.

The cat in his hand climbs up his arm and perches on his shoulder, rubbing his face against his cheek. You smile and lead him into the living room. Your husband was always a softy with Frerin.

All of the cats take a seat on the floor. Kili and Fili are tackling each other while Gandalf and Balin are sleeping. Thorin is pacing back and forth. Even in cat form, they were exactly like their human selves.

“Love?” you ask and cat!Thorin comes to a stop.

“Stop pacing. You’re making me nervous and you’re a cat,” you say and he huffs and you swear you see him roll his eyes.

“Don’t give me that look Thorin. You may be a cat but I will not hesitate to make you sleep on the couch,” you say and he hisses before taking a seat in front of you both.

“He sure is a grumpy cat,” Frerin states and Thorin narrows his eyes at him.

“He’s your father. What do you expect?” you ask, watching Fili and Kili.

Both of them are staring at each other.

You quietly sneak over to them and slam your hands on the ground. They both jump two feet off the ground before running in opposite directions.

Frerin giggles.

“Amad. We’re supposed to focusing on getting them back to normal,” he says as you go back to your original sitting position.

“I know, but that doesn’t mean I can’t have some fun,” you say, petting Thorin and making him roll over to show you his belly. Oh he was never going to live this down.


	2. Day One: pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dwalin gets added to the mess.

“Lass?” You hear as you step around the throne with Gandalf’s staff,”where’s Thorin? Or Balin? Or Fili for that matter?”

You give a small smile to Dwalin.

You had told Frerin to stay in the room to watch the cats. Thorin had tried to follow you but you closed the door before he had a chance to get out. As you were walking away, you could hear his meows as if he was yelling for you to come back and all you could do was laugh.

“Lets just say they’re occupied at the moment,” you say and he follows you out.

“Why do you have Gandalf’s staff?”

“Reasons,” you say before tripping over your own dress.

Ever since you chose the mortal life, you had become less graceful. Frerin had gotten the gracefulness though so that was good. Thorin found it unnerving how he could look like a dwarf, but move like an elf.

You use Gandalf’s staff to catch yourself and your eyes widen as a purple smoke comes out of the tip. Oh no.

You hear a poof and a thump and you look down and sure enough. Dwalin is there. As a cat. A black Siberian cat. You squeal at the little poof ball. You pick him up and he hisses but he suddenly looks surprised. He looks down at himself and his eyes widen in surprise.

“Yeah. Uh you’re a cat right now,” You tell him and if anything his eyes get wider.

“I’ll explain later,” you say, scratching behind his ear. You walk out of the throne room and the guards are looking at you weirdly.

“The King will be indisposed until further notice. You are dismissed,” you say before heading to your room.

“Everyone else is basically in the same state,” you say and he just meows. You roll your eyes.

When you get to your home, you put Dwalin down and he jumps onto the couch.

“Who’s this?” Frerin asks. “Dwalin. I tripped and caught myself with the staff and well that happened,” you say, looking around.

Fili and Kili were currently perched above the fireplace. Thorin was still pacing and Balin and Gandalf were still sleeping.

“Gandalf,” you say, poking said cat with his staff.

He looks up and glares at you before going back to sleep. You huff. He was such a lazy cat. Thorin starts pawing at your leg and you bend down to pick him up.

“Amad how are we supposed to turn them back if Gandalf will not even wake up?” Frerin asks, catching fili and Kili as they come flying at him.

“I don’t mind having them as cats,” you admit causing Thorin’s claws to dig into your hand. You flick him on his nose and he licks you hand, trying to ease the pain.

“We have six cats now. What are we supposed to do?” Frerin asks as you take a seat in front of the couch. You spread your legs in front of you and Thorin walks on top of your shins before lying down.

“We have to send word to Radagast. He will be the only one to fix this. For now, we will keep these six in here,” you say as Dwalin comes over to you.

You see him eye Thorin when suddenly he hits Thorin’s head with his paw. Thorin sits up, glaring and you giggle.

“Mr. Dwalin is itching for a fight,” Frerin says as Thorin and Dwalin start circling each other. “That’s because in this form its a fair fight. You know your father always wins in these,” you say and Dwalin stops his circling to glare at you.

Thorin pounces and you laugh as Dwalin is tackled to the ground.   
There is a knock on the door.

“Come in!” you say, eyes stuck on the two fighting best friends.

In walks Dis, looking confused.

“Y/n. Have you seen Fili or Kili? They were supposed to be home an hour ago,” Dis asks. Fili and Kili go bounding up to her, asking to be picked up.

“You see funny story. Uh Frerin accidently turned Gandalf, Balin, Fili, Kili and Thorin into cats and while grabbing Gandalf’s staff to figure this out, I accidently turned Dwalin into one,” you say as Dis bends over to pick Kili and Fili up.

They rub their faces against hers, purring contently. You turn back to watching the cats duke it out. Balin is up and takes a seat on Frerin’s lap.

“Why can’t those two be like Balin and Gandalf?” Frerin asks as Thorin and Dwalin knock over the side table.

“Oh please. They need to get rid of that sexual tension somehow,” you say and the two cats freeze and slowly turn towards you and it’s almost comical. Dis snorts as she takes a seat next to you.  
Thorin and Dwalin go back to tumbling around.

“Is there anyway to fix this?” Dis asks as Fili climbs into your lap.

“We should probably send word to Radagast but it might just be a temporary thing so I’m just going to wait it out till tomorrow. If they’re not back to their normal self I’ll send word to Radagast,” you say as Dwalin goes toppling into the fireplace.

He pops his head up and shakes off before crawling out. Thorin makes his way over to you but is soon tackled by Dwalin. You laugh. Those two were so cute.

Fili crawls up your torso and you hold his bottom. He licks your cheek and you giggle. You hear a hiss and suddenly Fili is being tackled off of your shoulder. You turn to find Thorin holding Fili down and hissing.

You smile and grab him by the scruff of his neck before pulling him into your arms. He licks at the same spot Fili was just licking before climbing out of your arms. You look down and your favorite light blue tunic was now covered in soot.

You whip your head to Dwalin who was now on the kitchen table trying to get a cookie from your cookie jar.

Sensing your gaze, he pauses, paw halfway into the jar.

“You ruined my tunic,” you grumble and he recoils, eyes widening,”my favorite tunic!”

Before you can even move, dwalin shoots off of the table and to somewhere else in your home. You, Dis, and Frerin burst out laughing. They were such silly cats


	3. Cats Day 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of litter boxes and scratches.

You sigh as Thorin walks away from the litter box. They did not turn back to their human forms so you had sent word to Radagast. He immediately replied with one of his birds saying that he could not come until the next month so you were currently stuck with six kittens and a Kingless kingdom.

You were currently trying to get Thorin to use a litter box that you hand scrounged up because it was easier, but he was having none of that. He absolutely refused to use it. Even in kitten form, he was a royal pain in your ass. 

You follow him and he walks into the bathroom. You lean on the doorway to watch what he was going to do. If he thought he could easily use the toilet in cat form, he was sorely mistaken. He hops onto the toilet and looks at you as if telling you to go away, but you stand your ground. He was a god damn cat! What did he have to hide? He rolls his eyes and moves to squat above the toilet, but he slips and falls in.

You can’t contain your laughter as he starts clawing his way out of the toilet. Because he’s so wet, he can’t get up. He looks like a drowned rat right now. You decide to have mercy on him and help him up. You grab him by his neck and drag him out.

“Don’t you dare go onto our bed Thorin or you’ll be sleeping on the couch for a week,” you threaten and he scurries off. You follow the wet trail and it leads you into your room. You look for Thorin, but he’s nowhere to be found. You look closely at the ground and the trail leads to under your bed. You giggle as you bend down to lie on the ground.   
Thorin is there, shivering. You lay on your arms as he hisses at you. 

“Don’t get mad at me, Thorin. I told you to use the litter box,” you say and he just hisses again. You reach out to pet him, but he swipes at you and actually makes a few scratches. You hiss, recoiling and sitting up. 

The scratches weren’t that deep but they were bleeding. This is the first time that he has ever hurt you, physically. You lean on the bed, reaching onto your night stand for the tissue that you always kept there. You hold it over your wound as Thorin slowly crawls out of the bed.

He tries to crawl up into your lap, but you push him away, bringing your knees to your chest. Thorin uses his paw to bring your hand over to him, but you grab his neck and place him outside of the door, slamming it shut. It was only a scratch, but you were not happy about it. You go to your bathroom to wash the blood away and patch it up. You hear Thorin crying, but you ignore it, opting to change into your nightgown. 

You hear a knock at the door. 

“Amad? Why is adad crying? It's so late,”

You hear Frerin ask before yawning. 

It was probably two in the morning. Due to the fact that Thorin was currently indisposed, you had to step up in his place and a meeting had run long and you had to stay for the whole thing. Thorin was waiting patiently for you to get home as you had not let him out, again. You weren’t ready for that yet.

“Your father decided to take a dip in the toilet and scratched me for helping him and he will now be sleeping on the couch,” you say, wrapping your hand. Frerin lets out a laugh. 

“Come on Adad, I don’t think you want to fall asleep wet let alone wet from toilet water,” Frerin says and you hear Thorin hiss before the two of them pad away.

You laugh at the loves of your life.

About ten minutes later, you hear pawing at the door, but you ignore it, opting to read over a few scrolls that needed to be signed by the end of the week. The pawing continues added with a few meows and after ten minutes, you let him in. 

Thorin follows you into the room and leaps up onto the bed as you take a seat on it. You pick up the scroll and pretend to be mad at him. He crawls under your arm and sits on your lap, blocking you from reading any more. You sigh and bring the parchment in front of his face to read it again. You smile a bit as he slips under your arms again and comes to rest on your chest. He licks your nose and you turn away. You giggle as he licks your ear. 

You put the parchment down on the side table and lift Thorin up, putting him on your lap. He licks the bandage and you can feel him purring, as if he was trying to tell you sorry. You smile and pet his head.

He moves as you move to make yourself more comfortable and then immediately climbs onto your chest. You smile as he licks your chin before nuzzling his head into your neck.

“Next time, just use the litter box alright?” you ask and he hisses before cuddling into you once again.


	4. Meetings With Kings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You decide to introduce Thorin to Thranduil and Bard.

Today was going to be an interesting day, you were sure of it.

Thorin was supposed to have  a meeting with your father and Bard. Something that occurred once a year just to make sure that Mirkwood, Dale, and Erebor were getting along and to make any new trade plans and to figure out what wasn’t working and what was.

You had yet to inform anyone about anyone’s transformation into a cat. You had just said that Thorin, Fili, Kili, Balin and Dwalin had a terrible sickness and needed to rest. Fili and Kili had left with their mother the day they were turned into cats and Dwalin, Balin, and Gandalf had stayed in the empty bedrooms in yours and Thorin’s home. You were pretty sure that Gandalf only came out of his room to eat and use the litter box.

You walk into the council room, holding the door open for Thorin to walk through. He meows in thanks before hopping onto the table. You gave in and decided to let him leave the house. If anyone asked, you would just say that you had a new pet that you were trying to train.

Bard, who is speaking with Thranduil, jumps in surprise as Thranduil raises a brow at the cat.

“Why is there a cat on the table?” Bard asks as you take a seat at the head of the table. 

During these meetings there was typically only you, Thorin, Bard and Thranduil. No advisors were allowed to be in the meetings after the first meeting had almost ended up with you skewering Bard’s top advisor for insulting Balin and your father.

“You see. There was a slight accident involving Gandalf’s staff and it seems that Thorin, the two princes, Dwalin and Balin, and Gandalf were all turned into cats,” you say, clearing your throat. 

There is a beat before Bard starts laughing, face going red. You see Thorin roll his eyes and you scratch behind his ear.

Out of the corner of your eyes you see Thranduil smile.

“So you’re telling me,” Bard says through his laughter,”That this is the king?”

You laugh.

“Yes. This is Thorin, King of the Kitties,” You say and Thorin turns to glare at you as Bard lets out another laugh. You smile and kiss him on his forehead. He rubs into you a bit before you pull away.

“Can you have Ori draw this and send it to me? This has to be my favorite thing ever,” Bard says, reaching out to pet Thorin but Thorin swipes and hisses at him.

Thranduil chuckles as Bard recoils.

“Seems like he is still as grumpy as his dwarf self,” Thranduil says.

“Trust me, I would know,” you say, pointing to your bandaged hand from last night. Thorin licks it before walking in a circle and deciding to just lay down in front of you, putting his head over your arm.

“When did you get that?” Thranduil asks, grabbing your hand and pulling towards him causing Thorin’s head to drop on the table. Thorin sits up and glares at Thranduil and you can see the little smirk on your father’s face. He definitely did that on purpose.

“Last night. Thorin had slipped into the toilet and was not too happy about it,” you explain causing Bard to start laughing again.

“I can’t,” Bard breathes out, face still red with tears streaming down his face.

You smile at him, Thorin drags your hand back to him to use as a pillow. You wait for Bard to calm down before speaking again.

“They will be in their cat forms for a whole month-”

Bard breaks into laughter once again and you sigh.

“Bowman,” Thranduil warns and Bard shuts his mouth.

“Sorry. Continue,” Bard says, smiling apologetically.

“Anyway, they will be stuck like this until Radagast arrives and until then I am taking Thorin’s place,” you say, unconsciously running your hand over his body.

“Does anyone know about his… misfortune?”

“As of now, it is only I, Frerin and Dis that know about this,” you say.

“How is my grandson?” Thranduil asks.

“He is quite well, father. He’s been wanting to visit for a while, but Thorin is very adamant on keeping him in the area. Ada has asked me to visit Imladris but Thorin is very keen on keeping the both of us in reachable distance. So basically Dale and Erebor,” you explain.

Over the years you started calling Thranduil father. The hate went away and you started to love him. You did not call him ada because that title was reserved for Elrond.

“Where is he?” 

“He is supposed to be coming here shortly if the cats don’t give him a hard time. He was busy training and was coming home as I was leaving and he asked if he could join. I decided to let him as long as he showered first,” you explain as the door opens. 

In walks Frerin with Balin in his hand and Dwalin following behind.

“I didn’t want to leave them in the room so I brought them with me. I figured they could use a nice walk and then I decided that it’ll be too much for Balin so I picked him up to carry him here,” Frerin explains as Dwalin jumps onto your lap.

You lean back a bit to watch what he’s going to do. He had a knack for scaring Thorin shitless and it was the funniest thing ever. They were like Kili and Fili in cat form.

Dwalin crouches a little before pouncing on Thorin. Thorin jumps two feet in the air before running off of the table and right onto Thranduil’s lap. Thorin turns and hisses at Dwalin before his eyes widen. You giggle as he turns to Thranduil with wide eyes and Thranduil looks down at him with a raised brow.

“I know you’re my son-in-law, but even this is too close for comfort,” Thranduil states and with that, Thorin climbs off of his lap and climbs onto yours, hitting Dwalin on the head with his paw as he does so.


	5. Sickness and Surprises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin makes you go to see Oin

The urge to vomit suddenly hits you. You throw the covers back, hitting Thorin in the process, and run into the bathroom, puking as soon as you’re above the toilet. You throw up a few more times and you feel Thorin climbing onto your lap.

You flush it down and lay your head on the toilet, resting a bit. You hated throwing up. It had to be the most weirdest experience ever. Thorin runs his head on your belly and you pet him.

“I’m fine, Thorin. Really, I am,” you say and he stops rubbing to give you a look. Even in cat form he still had a certain look that said “I’m not listening to your bullshit”.

You sigh at him.

“I’ll go and see Oin later on alright?” You asks and he nods before going back to rubbing your belly with his head. You sigh and pick him up, washing your mouth before going back to bed with Thorin right by your side.

The next time you wake up, it’s midday. You get dressed and head to the healer’s wing with Thorin right behind you. You had no meetings today due to the meeting with Bard and Thranduil yesterday. Thorin typically gave himself a day off after those to recuperate, but you really didn’t consider it recuperating given the fact that those days were spent doing… vigorous stuff.

“Meow,” you hear and you stop to look at Thorin and he’s sitting down, looking up at you.

“I am not picking you up Thorin. You can walk perfectly fine on your own,” you say, walking again. You feel his paw stop you by latching onto your dress and tugging. You look down at him and his eyes are wide as if pleading with you.

You now knew EXACTLY who taught Kili and Fili the puppy dog eyes. Although it was more effective now that Thorin was a cat. You sigh and bend down to pick him up. He rubs your cheek in thanks and you continue your trek to the healers wing.

“You’re such a lazy cat,” you mumble, running your hand along his fur. He just purrs.

When you get to the healers wing, the room is empty except for Oin who was currently sitting at a table mixing ingredients for his new “ointment” that you did not want to have any business in. He liked to experiment a lot. Especially on the company, however, he didn’t tell them that his treatments were actually experiments. If it went right, great, but if they got worse, he would say that the old remedy didn’t work well enough. You often stayed away from him once you figured out what he was up to.

Oin looks up at you and smiles, standing to pull you into a hug and crushing Thorin at the same time.

“Hello lass. When did you get a cat?” Oin asks, scratching behind Thorin’s ear. Thorin lets him because he would never hurt his older cousin. 

“This is Thorin,” you say and he stops his ministrations to give you a weird look. 

“Strange that you should name your cat after your husband,” he says before going back to his desk causing you to giggle.

“No this is actually Thorin. He was turned into a cat along with Dwalin, Balin, Fili, Kili and Gandalf,” you say and he looks back at you confused. 

Oin looks back down at his desk and reaches for his ear trumpet.

“I’m sorry. I must’ve misheard you. I thought you just said half of the Company were now cats,” Oin says and you nod again.

“They are indeed cats,” you say and Oin shakes his head.

“Oh mahal, I just rubbed the King’s head,” Oin says as if he just committed a crime, “I’m sorry cousin.”

Thorin just meows as if to say it’s alright. You put him down on one of the cots.

“Well what are you here for lass?” 

“I threw up this morning. It was nothing big but Thorin wanted me to come here anyway,” you say rolling your eyes as Thorin starts pacing yet again.

“Here why don’t you just lie down?” Oin says and you nod, following his instructions and hoping to get out of here as soon as possible.

Oin stands above you and starts massaging your stomach. Five minutes later, he looks up and frowns.

“When is the last time you bled?” 

That causes Thorin to finally stop pacing. 

You look at the ceiling trying to remember when the last you bled was.

“About two months ago,” you say and that causes Oin to smile.

“Well, might I be the first to congratulate you on your new son or daughter.”

You sit up quickly.

“I’m pregnant?” You ask.

Oin nods.

“Six weeks along most likely,” Oin says and your face breaks into a smile.

You and Thorin have been trying for YEARS after Frerin and you just couldn’t conceive but here you were 15 years later with your husband as a cat. Speaking of.

Thorin jumps over to your cot and you pick him up. He rubs his face against yours and there is so much purring going on. You kiss his forehead and he licks your face.

“We’re having another child,” you say and he meows.

You let him down and he begins rubbing his face on your belly meowing excitedly. You smile at him and Oin chuckles.

“What a time to be alive. Lets just hope your child isn’t a cat.”

That causes you to laugh.


	6. Jokes and Announcements

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili gets salty.

You stop your fussing in the kitchen as a knock sounds at your door. You put the rag down and look at Dwalin and Thorin as you walk to door. They were currently in front of the fire, laying down and meowing at each other quietly. They had been like that for a while. They would do that sometimes: just sit in front of each other and meow. They were probably having some in-depth conversation about something or the other. 

You open the door and smile down at Dis. She is currently holding Fili and Kili in her arms. Fili meows at you before jumping into your arms. You catch him easily, already used to his pounces or any of the cats’ pounces for that matter.

“Hey, y/n. Do you mind watching them? I’m going to the market to get something for dinner, but I don’t trust them by themselves. They’ve already broken two lamps and a bedside table,” Dis says, placing Kili on the ground as you pet Fili’s head. You laugh.

“Trust me. I know how it feels. Dwalin and Thorin love duking it out,” you say, looking at the two cats that were still meowing at each other and ignoring Kili who was now trying to jump on them. Dwalin hisses at him and Kili jumps before running off.

You shake your head and turn back to Dis.

“I’ll take care of your sons for you. It’s no problem at all,” you say and she smiles gratefully before pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“Thanks, y/n. I’ll see you when I get back,” she says and with that, she leaves. You close the door and put Fili on the ground. He looks at you as if wanting to be picked up again. You sigh and pick him up.

“You and your Uncle are both such needy cats,” you say, taking a seat at your dining table, “why can’t you be more like Kili and just distract yourself?”

Even looking like a cat, you can tell you hurt his feelings. He didn’t like being compared to Kili at all and it always hurt his feelings when he was compared to his younger brother and you knew this, but you only meant it as a joke.

He climbs out of your arms and onto the table, opting to lie down at the other end of the table. 

“Fee. You know I didn’t mean that,” you say and he turns so that his face is no longer facing you.

“Are you really mad at me for making that joke?” you ask and he looks at you slowly, before going back to lie down. The door opens and Frerin walks in holding a basket of what smells like fish.

“Gilrin said that this catch was from this morning so it’s as fresh as it can be,” Frerin says, petting Fili on the head before placing the fish on the counter.

“I’m just glad that I can finally let you leave the room by yourself. You know how your father is,” you say, rolling your eyes.

You hear a “meow” and you know its Thorin basically saying, “I heard that.”

“What’s wrong with Fee?” Frerin asks taking a seat to your right. You huff at the cat child. 

“He got mad because I said I wished he’d be more like Kili and distract himself,” you explain and Frerin laughs.

“Low blow, amad.”

“I know. It was an accident and he’s just being very stubborn right now just like a certain king,” you say and Frerin turns to look at the two cats.

“Are they really still in the same position? They’ve been like that since I left two hours ago,” Frerin says, looking back at you.

Those two were definitely up to something.

“I suppose. I really wish I could speak cat. It’s very unnerving to see to cats meowing at each other quietly unless they’re about to- uh- never mind,” you say, trying not to let your son get too curious about the birds and the bees.

Frerin lights up. 

“Speaking of sex,” he starts and you sigh, glaring at Thorin, “what did Oin say when you went to see him yesterday? Am I going to be a big brother?”

That questions causes Fili to lift his head and turn back to you. 

“Meow?” 

Fili walks closer to you and lays down with his paws out in front of him as if waiting for you to speak.

“Yes. You finally get to be a big brother,” you smiling as he breaks out into a grin as well. Fili stands, leaping on your shoulder to lick your cheek. You giggle at the sensation and so does Frerin.

“Fili seems more excited than I,” Frerin observes.

“He’s always wanted kids, but he hasn’t found the right dam yet which is why he dotes on you. Kili has Tauriel and Fili had you to dote on, but now that you’re older he has no one. Well, had no one. With Tauriel expecting to pop in the next month or so, he’s been very excited,” you say as Kili jumps onto the table to join you. 

Fili turns to hiss at him and Kili pouts, ears flopping down at eyes widening. You giggle at the two’s antics. They were very silly cats. 


	7. Of mood swings and parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mood Swings and Thranduil Comes to Visit You. This was originally two chapters but I made it as one.

“Meow.”

You ignore it, continuing to trek down the hall.

“Meow,” another cat calls out and you ignore him. You had a mission and that was to not give into the pleads of two of the four cats currently following you as you make your way to the throne room.

It was barely sunrise and Thorin and Dwalin were already up and were practically begging you to let them come with you. You had a feeling that whatever they were talking about yesterday had something to do with the reason as to why they were begging to leave.

As you were leaving your rooms, Fili and Kili were just walking by and by walking you meant sneaking. As soon as you opened the door, they stopped walking, looking absolutely terrified. You knew immediately that they had somehow snuck out of their home which is why you were currently in the situation you were in now.

Kili and Dwalin were absolutely fine with walking on their own, Thorin and Fili, however, absolutely hated it. They were so lazy. You figured they would love to strut about the city but it seems that age had caught up with Thorin. Fili had no excuse though.

“Meow.”

“Oh for Valar’s sake. I’m not picking either of you up. You chose to come so you will walk,” you snap irritably. 

You loved them as cats, you really did, but you just missed your husband so much. You missed lying on his strong arms and his forehead kisses and just everything about him.

That causes the cats to stop meowing. You get to the throne room and nod to the guards before taking a seat. You were now in a bad mood. The cats were nowhere to be seen and that made you more irritable. 

You decide to end the day at sunset. You could no longer stand sitting on the throne. You dismiss the guards and walk back to your home, just wanting to curl up and cry.

“Lass?” You hear and you turn around to find Bofur with Thorin and Dwalin on either side of him. Bofur is holding a package.

“So as I was walking around with Oin we got attacked by these two buggers,” Bofur says, nudging Dwalin with his foot. Dwalin just hisses.

“Sorry about that. I had no control over them today,” you say, not really happy to see anybody right now.

“It’s fine. It’s just weird seeing the two fiercest warriors in Erebor as cats,” Bofur says and Thorin rolls his eyes, “but I’m pretty sure this is meant for you.”

Bofur hands you the package and you give him a tight smile.

“Thanks Bofur. I’m sorry but I’m not really in a good mood right now. I’ll see you later?” You ask and he smiles at you before nodding. You walk back to your home.

When you get back to your home, you put the package on the table before going into your room and lying under the covers. Thorin jumps on the bed and you ignore him, closing your eyes.

He licks all over your face before you push him away.

“Leave me alone Thorin,” you sniff before turning to your other side. You missed your husband. A lot. You feel him jumping over you and landing on the bedside table. You can also feel him licking away the tears that had starting rolling down your face.

“I want you back,” you sob and he fits his body in the little space between the edge of the bed and you, continuously licking your tears away. You wrap your arms around his little body and he rubs his face against yours, trying to be as cuddly as possible. You really hoped Radagast would hurry up.

* * *

 

The next day, you completely forget about the gift and head to throne with the four cats following behind. Last night was not a good night for you, but Thorin tried his best to help out and it worked. You were in a slightly better mood today.

You take a seat on the throne and you notice that they ran off yet again. You roll your eyes. An hour later, Thranduil walks in with his guards following right behind him and you smile.

“Is Thorin not joining you today?”

You frown.

“He is still… sick,” you say, eying the dwarf guards. Thranduil smirks.

“Walk with me. I’m sure you could use the break,” Thranduil says holding out his hand. You look at him unsure.

“I don’t think I should. I just got here and I think I have a few meetings to conduct today,” you say.

Someone clears their throat and you look at the dwarf that has taken Balin’s place. Gwane was a very reasonable dwarf and was second to Balin which made perfect sense to you.

“You do not have any meetings my lady. In fact you canceled everything yesterday as you were walking out of the throne room,” he explains and you lean on your hand in embarrassment.

You have yourself a day off and forgot about it. How typical!

“Then why is everyone here?” You ask nodding towards him and the guards.

“Because you weren’t in a good mood yesterday and we knew you’d forget,” he says and you sigh as Thranduil chuckles. Thank Mahal Thorin chose such great workers.

“And why did you not bother to mention it earlier?” you ask and he smiles

“Because we like talking to you my lady. King Thorin often brags about you and it was a good opportunity to experience it first hand,” he explains and you blush.

“Very well. You’re all dismissed,” you say before standing and taking your father’s arm. The both of you leave and when you get out of the throne room, he dismisses his guards.

“I ran into a few unsavory characters earlier,” Thranduil starts.You raise your brow at him. Dwarves were typically accepting of elves since your reign as Queen begun. In fact, there were some elves that lived here which was very strange, but you had guessed that since the queen was an elf and the second heir’s wife was an elf, they became more welcoming. You were pretty sure that Fili would be the only one without an elf wife.

“What kind of unsavory characters?” you ask, curious as to who would dare stop the King of Mirkwood.

“Your kittens,” he says and you laugh, previous apprehension going away.

“Which ones?”

“Just two of them. Thorin and that bear guard of his. They seemed to be looking for something and Thorin pawed at me until I went over to see what he wanted. Made me buy a few items and ask for a wrap. Do you understand how crazy I looked talking to a cat?” he asks and you laugh.

“Either way you still would’ve looked crazy give the fact that you were shopping at a dwarven market,” you tell him. He smiles.

“Very true,” he replies.

“What did they want anyway?” you ask, curious as to what Thorin would want in cat form. He literally could not do anything with whatever he was buying unless it was food.

“Since it was in a wrap, I’m guessing it is supposed to be a surprise,” he says making you huff. Why was Thorin being so secretive and why was you father helping him? “Very well. I will just find out later tonight,” you say as you turn the corner.

The both of you are jumped on by a pair of cats and you go tumbling to the ground in surprise. Only you. Not you father. He was obviously prepared because he had the cat by it’s collar. The cat on you widens its eyes before moving to run away but you are faster and you grab it by its collar as well.

You glare at Kili as you stand.

“These two have been in the same spot all day yesterday. I walked pass here four times and they did not fail to attack,” Thranduil explains as Fili starts wiggling in his hand. “What were you doing here yesterday?” you ask, putting Kili in your arms and grabbing Fili so he did not have to struggle as much.

“I wanted to see some of the jewels. They are quite lovely. Although after being pounced on four times, I got sick of coming to Erebor and only came here to say goodbye,” he says, glaring at the cats and they turn to hide their heads under your armpits causing you to giggle.

“Yes. My nephews are quite an armful it seems. If I told their mother half of the things I had caught them doing, I am sure she would’ve put them in cages as punishment,” you explain and the two of them come out of under your armpits, afraid. You just shake your head in amusement. 

“Up you two get. I don’t feel like carrying you both in my arms,” you say and they meow before hopping onto your shoulders. 

“I do not understand your fondness of cats,” Thranduil states as you continue your walk, albeit a little slower due to the two cats on your shoulders. “And I do not understand yours for elk,” you retort and he smiles. You see Ori making his way down the hall holding a stack of books that is barely allowing him to see. You feel Kili moving and you know what’s coming.

“Don’t you-” but before you can finish your sentence, he jumps and, due to the underestimated distance, falls straight to the ground. You laugh as Ori stops to look at the cat.

“Is there a reason there’s a cat trying to attack me?” Ori asks, still staring at Kili as he stands straight, shaking his head to get rid of any aftershocks. “Kili is just being a jerk,” you say and Ori’s eyes widen as if he’s understanding something. “So this is Kili? Oin had mentioned something earlier when he came to the library. I didn’t think it was true. That must be Fili,” he says, looking at the cat on your shoulder.

“It is. You should see Dwalin and Thorin. They make the cutest cats,” you say putting Fili as Kili tugs at Thranduil’s robes.

“I would love to but I have other business to tend to. See you later, y/n and congrats!” he says before walking past you.

You look over to your father and he and Kili are having a stare off. You wonder if your father would pick him up. Kili may be a cat, but he was Kili. Kili swings his tail back and forth and Thranduil sighs before bending over to pick him up. Kili meows, content, and rubs his face over your fathers. This just shows exactly how much he has changed over the past 16 years.

“Why did that dwarf congratulate you exactly?” Thranduil asks as you continue your walk with both cats riding on your shoulders.

“Well. You’re going to be a grandfather again,” you say and another smile breaks out. You noticed a few months back that he smiled a lot more than when he did when you first met him and it was very befitting.

“Am I? Well, I hope it won’t be a cat,” he says and you roll your eyes. Thorin was never going to live this down once he was back to being a dwarf. Speaking of, you see Thorin and Dwalin walking down the hall as if they owned the place. A few dwarves do a double take but other than that they just ignore the stray cats.

Thorin hisses as he sees you and Fili immediately jumps to Thranduil’s other shoulder. Fili knew not to touch you when Thorin was around because he became more dangerous as a cat. Cat thorin could move faster than dwarf thorin could and cat thorin did not need to worry about his public image because he had none. Thorin jumps into your arms and licks your face as Dwalin weaves through your legs.

“Hello, husband, what have you been up to today?” you ask and Thorin pauses his licking to look at Thranduil.

‘I didn’t say a word,” he says and Thorin goes back to licking your face. “I am concerned about the fact that you guys get along better with Thorin as a cat than you do with Thorin as a dwarf,” you admit as you continue walking.

“That’s because I can now talk down to Thorin and he can’t respond,” Thranduil says and Thorin turns to glare at him, fluffy tail hitting your face. You cough as a few strands of fur get in your mouth. “But you always talk down to him,” you say and Thorin looks up at you, betrayed. You smile and kiss his forehead.

“Ada, if you were a cat, what do you think you would look like?” you ask, slipping on the word usage. Thranduil smirks.

“I’d sure as hell look better than the one currently in your arms.”

And with that, Thorin pounces. Fili and Kili scramble off of Thranduil as Thorin pounces on him. You look down at Dwalin and he’s waving his tail excitedly as if wanting to join in the fray. You roll your eyes. They were going to be the death of you, you were sure of it.  


	8. Visitors and Small Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bilbo returns to Erebor and your son Frerin faces racism.

The next day, you find yourself still wondering what Thorin bought and why he brought it. When you came home last night, it was completely gone. It was like it never existed in the first place. You had asked Frerin where the two packages went and he just shrugged. You knew he was lying because he could never look you in the eyes when he did. You just sighed and let Thorin do what he wanted to do. He was such a weird cat.

When you’re finished with duties, you head back to your home wanting to speak to Frerin as soon as possible. A guard had said that he saw Frerin walking back to your home and he looked like he had been crying. You wanted to know who dared hurt your baby.

You open the door and you find Fili and Kili on your dining table. Again. You loved them, but Dwalin, Thorin, Fili, and Kili, together was a basically a ticking time bomb. You’ve had to replace multiple dishes and the bedside table. Twice. You really had no idea why they had to fight in your bedroom anyway. It has only been 9 days.

You look around, but you don’t see any damages. You let out a sigh of relief. You close the door behind and you turn around only to get a handful of Thorin. You smile as he licks your cheek.

“Can you just imagine if you guys were turned into dogs instead? I think I’d kick you out and let you wander around as strays,” you say and he stops licking your face to glare at you.

“Don’t give me that look,” you say, placing him on the floor. You go to Frerin’s room and knock.

“Frerin, one of the guards said you didn’t look happy today. Do you want to talk?” You ask.

“Come in,” you hear and you open the door to find him sitting on the floor and leaning on the bed. He was just staring at nothing.

“I don’t want to live here anymore,” he mutters and that shocks you. “What do mean love?” You ask, taking a seat on the floor next to him. Thorin jumps over you and onto Frerin’s lap.

“They hate me amad. All of the children hate me and even some of the older dwarrow. Why do I have to be so different?” He asks and you can see his eyes watering. You sigh and pull him into a one armed hug.

You did this to him. It was your fault that he couldn’t fit in anywhere. He was part dwarf, part human, and part elf and because of it, he was judged by the others.

“Love. Don’t listen to what anyone says. I went through the same thing you did when I was engaged to your father,” you tell him. “Really?” he asks, looking at you and you wipe his tears away. “I did. One of the seamstresses that your aunt Dis and I went to for my dress called me an elf whore who had no business marrying Thorin and Here I am 16 years later with my husband as a cat,” you say and Frerin laughs as Thorin hisses. You see the other cats slowly making their way into the room except for Gandalf. Gandalf was such a lazy being.

“Everyone one of these cats- ow, dwarves here have helped settle into the mountain and they didn’t take anyone’s insults lightly and they will do the same for you because they love you and so do we,” you say, pushing Dwalin away as he swipes at you.

Fili and Kili purr and rub themselves against Frerin. Balin perches on your thighs, looking at Frerin and Dwalin takes a seat next to Thorin. Well, more like ontop of Thorin. Frerin laughs and pets Dwalin on his head.

“If you ever have problems with anyone just sick Dwalin on them. He could probably claw their eyes out,” you say and Dwalin nods, making you smile.

“Now about that gift,” you start and the four of them run out in a hurry making Frerin laugh. Balin just looks confused before lying down and shutting his eyes. It must be very tiring for him. He was getting older so it must be a nice break from everything.

“Amad. You’re never going to get it out of them. At least not until adad is back to his normal self,” Frerin says and you pout before pulling him into another one armed hug.

“If you ever feel self-doubt just remember that you have people that love you. Whether it be the elves of Rivendell or the elves of Mirkwood we all love you and we will continue to love you no matter what,” you tell him and he smiles before pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“I love you too amad,” he says and you smile. The moment is ruined by a knock on the door. You sigh and Balin gets off of your lap so you could answer the door.

You go to the living area and you narrow your eyes at the four cats currently sitting on the dining table and meowing at each other. They look at you and narrow their eyes as well. You shake your head and go to open the door. Imagine your surprise when you find Bilbo.

“Bilbo Baggins! It’s so good to see you!” you say, pulling him into a hug. He returns it before pulling away. “If I knew you were coming, I would’ve made tea. Why don’t you come on in?” you ask, stepping aside. He smile up at you before coming in.

“I sent word to Thorin about two weeks ago that I was in Mirkwood and that I should be arriving, well, now actually. Speaking of, where is Thorin? I haven’t seen him in the throne room and when did you guys get cats?” Bilbo asks, taking a seat on the kitchen table as you get a kettle to make tea.

“Well, you see, those are actually Kili, Fili, Dwalin, and Thorin. The one you’re petting right now is Dwalin,” you say and Bilbo’s eyes widen. They slowly look at each other and Dwalin hisses making Bilbo fall back in shock. You roll your eyes and flick Dwalin on his nose. He sneezes as you put the kettle on the fire.

“They pretend to be mean, but they’re actually really nice. Although, they’re the cause for all of my broken furniture,” you say, helping the hobbit up.

“How?” He asks and it seems he’s at loss for words. 

“Uh Gandalf’s staff. Twice. Gandalf is somewhere around here,” you say as Frerin comes out of the room carrying Balin. Balin is the only cat you carry everywhere. He deserves it. 

“Hello Uncle Bilbo,” Frerin says and Bilbo sends him a smile.

“Hello my boy. How are you?” Bilbo asks as Frerin takes a seat across from him. “I’ve been better,” Frerin says as the cats gather around to sit in front of him. “Oh?” You shake your head. “Some kids have been treating him differently because of his heritage,” you explain and that causes Bilbo to laugh. You forgot. Of all people that experienced racism it was him.

“I understand that. It was like that for your mother and I until we saved Thorin’s life,” Bilbo says and you smile as Thorin comes over to you. He reaches out for your sleeves and snags them and brings it to the table. You smile and he looks at you and looks back at your other arm and then back to you. You just smile at him and he hisses before bringing your other am to the table, resting on your right. You smile and pet his head. 

“Really?” Frerin asks, surprised. You never really got into the little details. Only the major ones like the hobbit hole, the trolls, rivendell, goblin town, etc. You never told him the stories of how you were treated. You weren’t ready to tell him.

“Yes, but we’re not going to get into that right now, alright?” you ask and Frerin nods. 

“What are they like as cats? I feel like Thorin and Dwalin are rascals,” Bilbo says as Fili comes up to him meowing to be pet. Bilbo obliges as Dwalin glares at him. Bilbo huffs. “Don’t look at me and pretend like you’re the most innocent cat here. I’m pretty sure you’re hiding all of your silliness behind that exterior,” Bilbo says and Dwalin huffs before lying down on the table.

 “It’s like having four Kilis. Energetic little shits that have you worn out only one hour into the day,” you say, rolling your eyes. Thorin nips at you and you flick his ear. He licks it and Bilbo laughs.

 “As long as they’re not bringing you dead birds. I heard that cats bring dead things to their owner as a show of affection,” Bilbo says making you laugh as the kettle rings. You grab out two cups and make the tea. “Thorin has bought two gifts so far. The first one he made Bofur buy and the second he made my father buy. If he keeps that up, he’s going to be in so much debt by the time he returns to his normal self,” you say, pouring the hot water into a cup.

 “What does cat Thorin need?” Bilbo asks. “No idea and I will continue to have no idea until the end of the month. Thorin has hidden it from me,” you say and Bilbo snorts. “Typical,” he says and Thorin narrows his eyes at him. Bilbo just rolls his eyes again. “You’re not intimidating Thorin and I doubt you will be intimidating when you’re back to normal. Not when I’ve seen you as a cat,” Bilbo retorts and Thorin hops off the table, making you confused. Suddenly, Bilbo lets out a yelp and clutches his leg as Thorin goes running away.

You and Frerin laugh.

“He likes to attack things even if he’s very small. Trust me, I would know,” you say, pointing to your healing scratches.

“If I were a cat, I’d probably drown him first,” Bilbo mutters, wiping his cut his handkerchief. You smile at him. Having Bilbo around will sure be interesting.


	9. Payback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kitty yoga, other company members meet the cats, and Dwalin and Thorin get revenge.

When you return to your home the next day, Bilbo is there talking to Dis and Frerin with Fili curled up in his lap. You look around for the other cats and Thorin, Dwalin, and Kili are stretching out. Like they were copying each other and doing the same stretches like some type of kitty yoga. 

Thorin looks up as the door closes and comes over, meowing. You catch him and place a kiss on his nose and he licks your nose in return. You move away from the door but a knock on the door stops you.

You turn and open it to find Dori looking nervous. Oh no.

“Y/n….. my king,” Dori snorts and Thorin hisses. You smile, petting Thorin.

“Nori uh may or may not have gotten into trouble again,” Dori says and you sigh as Thorin meows. Dori seems to have caught on to the meaning behind the meow.

“Some dwarves were talking bad about Ori and Nori decked them. Bloody noses the lot of them. Deserved more than just bloody noses if you asked me,” Dori mumbles and Thorin climbs onto your shoulder to meow something. You hear someone else meow back and you turn to find Dwaling climbing over the couch. You catch him just as he pounces.

Fili and Kili climb up onto the couch and Dis, Frerin, and Bilbo look confused as to what’s going on. Fili meows and Thorin meows back before turning back to Dori expectantly. He quickly looks back at Fili and meows again. Fili hits Bilbo with his paw before nodding towards Thorin. You laugh as Bilbo flicks Fili.

“I’m going to take a guess and say that I am meant to follow you folks,” Bilbo says, standing. “I suppose. Choose a cat because I’m not carrying the both of them,” you say and immediately Thorin jumps over to Bilbo.

“Well then,” you huff, “Dwalin was always better company anyway.” Thorin hisses. “We’ll be back sometime,” you say before following Dori out the door. “Dori. You know we can’t keep doing this,” you say. “I know but its been ten years. He’s been doing good. It’s just that he couldn’t handle it anymore,” Dori says. “What were the words exchanged?” Bilbo asks, trying and failing to keep up with you. You slow down and he looks up at you in thanks.

“Something about him being the weakest dwarf to have ever been born and he should’ve been a hobbit not a dwarf,” Dori explains and Thorin and Dwalin hiss while Bilbo huffs. Thorin and Dwalin, ever since the journey ended, had become very protective of the youngest member of the company. Whenever they caught even a sniff of something bad being said about Ori, they would take care of it without the scribe knowing and it warmed your heart.

“What of the other dwarves? What happened to them?” you ask. “Oin has them in the healer’s wing,” Dori says and before you can stop them, Thorin and Dwalin go running of and Dori laughs. “They’re about to get more than just a broken nose,” he says and Bilbo laughs. “I should probably follow them to pull the other dwarves away from the claws of death. You laugh as he runs after them and you and Dori continue to make your way to the cells.

You stop in front of Nori’s cell. “Hey, elfie,” Nori says and you nod at the guards to let him out. They do and as soon as he steps out, you slap him on the back his head. “Ow! What was that for?” he asks, rubbing his head. “You’re getting too old for this crap Nori. I’d like to think that you’d find ways to not get caught,” you say and that earns raised brows from the guards.

“Back to work,” you say and they leave as you three continue your walk. “I’ve tried to control the anger, but no one picks on Ori. No one,” Nori says and you smile. Nori may be a criminal but he definitely had a heart and his head was definitely in the right place.

“You know. I was hoping to meet your kitties,” Nori says as you turn down the hall to the healer’s wing. “They were with me, but I’m pretty sure they’re gauging the dwarves’ eyes out,” you say. Nori scoffs. “Typical,” he says as you see Thorin and Dwalin running up to you with Bilbo following right behind. Thorin leaps into your arms and Dwalin hides behind your skirts.

Bilbo stops, leaning on his knees to take a breather. “Oin didn’t see them sneaking in and they made a few deep scratches on their faces before oin caught them,” Bilbo explains and you smile at your husband and Dwalin. Those two could rule the world if they wanted to. “And why is this one hiding,” Nori says, bending down and grabbing Dwalin by the fur on his neck.

“I tried prying him off and he scratched my neck in the process,” Bilbo explains and sure enough, there are three angry red marks on his neck. You raise a brow at Dwalin as he squirms. “I hope to Mahal that this is Dwalin and that I am not carrying the King Under the Mountain by his neck,” Nori mumbles turning Dwalin to face you.

“Yeah that’s Dwalin and they’re both a pain in my ass. It’s like they de-aged a hundred years or something,” you say and Nori laughs before turning Dwalin to face him. 

“You’re just lucky that only the Company members are aware of your situation. I doubt anyone else would take you seriously any more,” Nori says and he hisses as Dwalin scratches him, letting Dwalin fall to the ground. Dwalin jumps on Bilbo and uses his paw to rub at the red scratches.

“If that’s an apology, I’ll accept it as long as you don’t start licking me,” Bilbo says, rubbing Dwalin’s head causing the three of you to laugh.


	10. Snow Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You decide to take the cats out to play in the snow.

“Amad! Amad! Amad! It’s snowing! Can we go out in the snow today?!” Frerin shouts excitedly, jumping on the bed. Thorin let’s out a yelp and scrambles onto your face, scratching it in the process. You let out a yelp as well, turning on your side, making Thorin fall off of the bed.

You turn to glare at Frerin and he looks at you sheepishly. You sigh, turning to lie on your back. That was one hell of a way to wake up in the morning.

Thorin leaps up on your bed and licks your face, purring apologetically. “It’s not your fault love. I know,” you say and he gives you last lick before turning to sit up and look at Frerin. You learned quickly that that was his “not happy” stance.

“I’m sorry Adad I thought you both would’ve been up by now,” Frerin says, lip trembling as you sit up. Thorin pads over to him and stretches so that his paws are on both of Frerin’s shoulders. There is a second of your boys just staring at each other before Thorin licks Frerin’s nose, causing your son to laugh.

You smile as you sit up.

“What time is it?” You ask. “Well after sunrise which is why I figured you’d be up. Can we please go outside to play?” Frerin asks as Thorin takes a seat in his lap.

That causes you to frown. You had a lot to do today. Meetings to hold and dignitaries to deal with.

“Frerin I’m very busy today,” you say and the smile immediately drops off his face.

“But- but you’ve always taken me outside on the first snowfall because Adad was always busy,” he says pout now becoming a frown and eyes now watering. Oh you could not let him cry. Not after seeing him cry two days ago.

“And I will not break that tradition,” you say and immediately his face brightens,”go and get dressed. I shall be ready in five.”

Frerin gets up quickly causing Thorin to fall onto the floor yet again and you laugh as Frerin runs out the door. You pick Thorin up and place him on the bed.

“You my dear husband are joining us today for once in your life,” you say, putting on your clothes. He just Meows.

By the time you get out of Erebor, there are many children human and dwarf alike. Fili, Kili, Dwalin and Thorin were following right behind you while Frerin carried Balin and you carried Gandalf. That old geezer needed to get out anyway.

You smile as Frerin goes running towards Tilda, Sigrid and her eight year-old daughter. They were basically his only friends, at least that’s what you heard from Bain and it made your heart warm at the fact that Frerin had someone even if they were twice his age or half his age.

You smile as Fili tries to launch himself at Dwalin, but Dwalin ducks, making Fili land in the snow. It’s obvious that the snow is deep because you can no longer see him. You put Gandalf down and walk your way over to Fili, pulling him out of the snow. He licks your hand before you place him on the ground. You look for Thorin and he’s sitting a few feet ahead of you with Balin.

You bend down to make a snowball and with your aim, you hit Thorin in the back of his head. Thorin looks at you slowly, snow falling off of his head. You smile as he leaps and gets stuck. It takes him five minutes to reach you because the snow is so deep. You catch him as he launches himself at you.

“Seems like you were having some issues, love,” you say and he meows. The both of you turn to watch everyone. Kili and Fili were currently circling Dwalin. They both pounce at the same time and Dwalin ducks, causing Fili and Kili to knock heads. Balin was currently chasing around a dwarfling and Gandalf was spinning in circles trying to catch snowflakes.

You look for your son and he was currently building a snow fort with the help of Bilbo, Ori, and Sigrid’s daughter, Elaine. Thorin jumps out of your hand and runs over to them, bowling into the half made fort causing Frerin and Elaine to groan. Before Thorin can run off, Bilbo grabs him by his collar, looking very put off. Before he can start his ranting, Fili, Kili, and Dwalin tackle him to the ground, causing Thorin to drop.

You and Frerin laugh at Bilbo’s misfortune and go to help them. The cats may be a pain in your ass, but they still brought join to those around them and that is all you could ask for.


	11. Sickness and Surprises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being a mortal, you are prone to get sick.

You sneeze, pulling the blanket tighter around you.

Ever since you chose the mortal life, everyday after the first snowfall, you became sick. This year was the exact same. Thorin always told you to stop going outside during the first snowfall, but you would not deny your child his happiness.

Frerin places a cup of hot tea in front of you and you thank him. Maybe you should listen to your husband now that you were with child. It would not do you well to lose them due to your sickness.

You look up to find Thorin sitting on his paws looking at you as if to say, “i told you so.”

You roll your eyes and take a sip of the tea.

“Stop looking at me like that Thorin or I’ll put that collar on,” you threaten.

You asked Bofur to make you collars for Fili, Kili, Thorin, and Dwalin in case they got lost. It was a requirement for them since they always left the room. You made sure there was an engraving that said “If lost, return to Dis or y/n.”

It was just easier for you and you didn’t have to worry about them leaving the room as much.

Thorin jumps off of the table and you smirk. He knew not to mess with you.

There is a knock on the door and Frerin goes to open it.

Bilbo walks in with basket and Kili in his other hand. The basket doesn’t catch your attention. Its the dam carrying Fili that catches your attention.

You could hear Fili purring from here and that had to mean something.

The dam looks nervous as hell. She has green eyes and brown hair and her side burns were braided into her hair which was worn half up and half down. You thought she was the prettiest dam next to Dis.

“We’ve found your cats. Y/n, this is Renicia. Fil- uhm Toby and George were bothering her before i found them,” Bilbo says, having to correct himself.

“My queen,” she says, bowing as much as she can while holding the cat.

“Just call me y/n. Thank you for bring my cats home. They do tend to get lost,” you sniff as Kili leaps onto a chair and onto the table.

“I didnt expect the king and queen to have cats lets alone six of them,” she says as she looks around. Gandalf was sitting ontop of the fireplace while Dwalin and Balin chased each other. Thorin was sitting on the end table, tail swinging back and forth, looking about ready to pounce.

“I’m just babysitting for a month. Would you like to join me for tea?” You ask.

“Oh i would love to but i need to get back home. I stayed out longer than i anticipated thanks to this little fella,” she responds, rubbing behind Fili’s ear before putting him down.

“Well you are welcomed here anytime! Have a good day,” you say and she smiles at you before turning to leave.

When the door shuts, you turn to look at Fili. He was currently sitting at the door, waving his tail back and forth as if waiting for her to come back.

You exchange a look Bilbo before laughing.

“Seems like our little kitty finally found someone he’s interested in,” Bilbo says, unpacking his basket which were filled with herbs that Oin had given to him.

“Too bad he’s a cat right now,” Frerin says and you all watch as Fili sinks down to the ground, staring at the door.

“You’ve spent time with her Kili. Do you think she’s fit for Fili?” You ask as the dark haired prince comes over to you for some loving.

Kili meows and you pet his head.

“That’s good for him. Speaking of other halves, where is Tauriel exactly? I figured I would’ve seen her at least once,” you ask.

Since it wasn’t a yes or no question, Kili doesn’t answer. Instead he just stops and looks at you and you swear, if cats could raise brows, he would be doing so.

“She was in Mirkwood. I ran into her there. Said she had things to deal with back home,” Bilbo says, as he brings out a few cat toys. You raise your brow at him and he shrugs.

“It was just some fun things I found in the market,” he says, shaking one of the toys, making it jingle. Your eyes widen as all five cats huddle in front of Bilbo.

Bilbo lets out a smile and walks over to the carpeted area, shaking the toy so they’d follow him. You follow too, curious as to what would happen.

Bilbo takes a seat on the floor and they all sit in front of him, staring at the toy intensely. Bilbo places it on the ground and slowly moves it back and forth making sure it has their attention and then, he jerks it back and forth quickly causing Fili and Dwalin and Kili and Thorin to headbutt. Balin is the only cat to actually catch a toy. You let out a laugh. Being sick was totally worth it.


	12. Argument

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Thorin get into a fight.

You sigh from your seat on the throne. You just wanted to go back home to your kittens, but you were stuck in a meeting with a few nobles from the Iron Hills.

You loved your cousin in law dearly, but why did he have to send someone to Erebor every month? Once every three months would be fine, but no. He decided to go a step beyond and send the one noble you hated with a passion.

“Where is the King? An elf shouldn’t be running dwarven relations,” he sneers.

His name was Janule and he despised elves. Absolutely DESPISED them. He is worse than Thorin was on the journey. He always voiced his dislike for you and the only reason Thorin didn’t say anything was because the dwarf is Dain’s brother-in-law. You, however, had no problems speaking your mind.

“I don’t think that is any of your business. If you are done being an absolute shit, I will kindly ask you to leave,” you say and he narrows his eyes at you.

“This won’t be the last you hear of me!” he exclaims before turning around.

“Hopefully I will go deaf before then so I don’t have to hear your banshee self. You kiss ass little prick,” you snap and you watch furiously as the dwarf leaves.

When you calm down, you look at Gwane and he looks amused and nervous at the same time.

“Too much?” you ask and Gwane and the guards nod in unison.

“Too much,” they all reply.

“Meow!” you hear and you look at your feet to find Thorin and by the slow movement of his tail, he was not too pleased.

You sigh and stand, catching Thorin as he leaps at you.

“I am calling it a day. There has been too much going on,” you say and they grunt before you leave.

“Meow.”

You sigh.

“I know Thorin, but I’m tired of the way I’m treated by him.”

“Meow meow.”

“I’m not going to sit back and get insulted by some dwarf lord,” you snap and that makes a few dwarves turn to you with their eyebrow raised.

You give them a nervous smile before quickly making your way back to your home.

You dump him on the floor, slamming the door shut.

Frerin looks up from his spot on the table with Fili and Kili.

“Everything alright amad?”

“Your father thinks that I should let myself be insulted by other dwarves and keep my mouth shut to keep relations good,” you snap, making your way into the kitchen to prepare dinner. Frerin raises his brow, exchanging a look with cat Fili and Kili.

“Adad is a cat,” he says, slowly.

“I know that! I am not stupid!” You snap and you instantly regret it as Frerin jumps.

You and Thorin never raised your voices at Frerin. You knew that yelling would not fix anything so you both made it a point to not yell at him.

You sigh and make your way over to Frerin kissing him on his forehead.

“I’m sorry my love. I have no idea what’s gotten into me,” you apologize.

“It’s probably because adad got into you,” Frerin explains and you narrow your eyes at Fili and Kili.

The cheek on him definitely came from his cousins.

They scramble off the table as Thorin lets out a short but very loud meow as he leaps onto the table. You just know that he just snapped Frerin’s name.

“I do suppose you’re right, however, I do not appreciate your cousins teaching you about those kinds of stuff and they will be in so much trouble,” you say, walking back into the kitchen.

You hear two long meows and you know your nephews are complaining. Thorin hops onto the counter and you grab him by his neck and put him on the floor.

You didn’t want to deal with him right now.

Dwalin hops onto the counter and you pet him before going back to preparing dinner.

Thorin tries to leap back onto the counter but Dwalin blocks his way making him fall back to the ground. Thorin hisses at Dwalin as he begins to rub against your arm. If cats could smirk, Dwalin would be doing so.

Throughout the course of your dinner preparation, Dwalin keeps Thorin from having any physical contact with you making you smile.

He wasn’t doing this to annoy Thorin, he was doing this to protect you. Dwalin must’ve heard your argument when you came storming in.

Even after all these years, he was still as overprotective as ever which is why he was one of Frerin’s godfathers, the other being Balin.

Bilbo and Dis joins you for dinner and Dwalin sits in front of you, hissing at Thorin every time he gets close.

“What’s wrong with Dwalin?” Bilbo asks.

“Thorin and I had an argument- yes I know he’s a cat don’t give me that look- and Dwalin heard so he’s not letting Thorin near me,” you explain and Dis chuckles as Thorin glares at Dwalin from the other side of the table.

After dinner is done and cleaned up, you go to your room, closing it before Thorin has a chance to get it. You hear meowing from the other side and you know that Dwalin is arguing with Thorin. Thorin was taking the couch tonight and Dwalin was going to make sure of it.


	13. Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin apologizes in his own special way.

“Meow.”

You ignore it as you make your way down the hall. You still were not happy with Thorin.

As soon as you stepped out of your bedroom door, you saw Thorin sleeping there and you felt bad but you had to keep your resolve strong.

You were going to let him know that you were angry at the fact that he chose his kingdom over his queen even though he was a cat.

“Meeeeooooowwww.”

It takes all your will power to not look down. You were not going to give in. So easily.

You stop in front of the throne room to speak to the guards.

“This cat is not allowed to enter. Keep him in Erebor but keep him out of the throne room,” you say and they look at you, confused for a second before turning to the cat and nodding at you.

You open the doors to the throne room and walk in.

“Meo-.”

You know the guard picked Thorin up as his meow is cut short and you smile.

They were really loyal dwarves.

You go to the throne and take a seat.

“My lady. A letter came from Lord Dain,” Gwane says, handing you a piece of parchment.

You sigh as you take it.

You were not expecting Dain to respond so soon.

You open the letter expecting a verbal beating but your mouth drops open as you read the letter.

_“Y/n! My favorite queen under the mountain!_

_I hope you are doing well! It has been a while since I last heard from Thorin and I was starting to get a bit worried. It seems that some very nasty words were exchanged between you and my brother in law and I had to say this: thank you for putting him in his place. That little dragon dung deserves to be dragged and kicked off of his high horse! Even Grina was glad you did what you did. Can’t stand her brother. Anyway, I am only sending you a letter as evidence that I’ve sent you something. Don’t mind Janule. He’ll be out of your hairs soon. Also please tell my cousin to write me, will you? I’m worried that he might have died. Anyway, have fun tree shagger._

_Love Always,_

_King Boar.”_

You laugh loudly. Dain was a fun character and you sometimes wondered how he and a Thorin were related.

You smile happily as you enter a few meetings with dwarves and elves.

Come lunch, Bofur visits with a bouquet of roses. You laugh.

“You really need to tell your husband to stop shopping,” he says as he hands the flowers to you.

“It’s not my fault he was being a jerk,” you say and you clutch your heart as Thorin pops his head out of Bofur’s tunic, looking around.

You shake your head.

“He’s a sly bugger. I told the guards to keep him out. Of course he’d find a way in,” you say, reaching out for Thorin.

He immediately jumps into your arms and starts purring his lungs off as he rubs against your face.

“I was very surprised when he started crawling into my tunic, trust me, but sometimes you just have to go with it,” he says and you laugh, dismissing your guards and Gwane.

“How is everything? I haven’t been able to catch up with any of the company members due to everything that’s happened,” you say as Bofur takes a seat on the stairs before you.

“We’re doing great. Bombur is expecting yet another child-.”

“Another? How much does he have already?” You ask as Thorin begins nuzzling your stomach at the mention of child.

“10! This is going to be his 11th. He’s probably-,”

He stops as Thorin starts retching.

You put him on the ground and soon he’s puking up a furball.

Thorin looks at you before looking down at his furball, jumping in surprise.

You laugh.

“I was wondering when that was going to happen. None of them have actually had a furball yet which I was surprised about,” you explain as Thorin Jumps on your lap.

He goes to lick your face, but you place a finger on his nose, stopping him.

“Uh uh. No kisses from you and your furball mouth,” you say and he recoils, looking at you with wide kitty eyes.

You ignore him and look at Bofur who has an amused smile on his face.

“You see the things I have to deal with?”

He laughs.

“I can’t wait till they all become dwarves again. Can you just imagine how much references could be made?”

You laugh too, petting your lovely cat of a husband.


	14. Another One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frerin brings home yet another surprise.

When you wake up, Thorin is nowhere to be found. It was strange because he was always down for morning cuddles. Well, according to his contented purrs he was.

Thorin returns to your room with a very long piece of string in his mouth causing you to raise your brow. Why did he have a string in his mouth?

He leaps onto the bed and you watch him from your side.

He places his paw on your shoulder and brings it towards him, telling you to lay on your back. You do as he asks and stare at the ceiling a bit before turning to your husband.

He digs his claws into your sleeves and drags it to him causing you to shuffle over. Now you were really interested.

He moves over to your belly and smooths your dress out. Thorin places one end of the string on one side and leaps over to the other side with the other end in his mouth and you catch on to what he’s doing.

He’s trying to measure your belly.

You giggle and he stops what he’s doing to look at you. You laugh as the string hangs from his mouth.

“Really, Thorin? I am literally only seven and a half weeks pregnant. Im not going to be showing yet,” you say.

“Meooowwwww.”

“Yes I know you did it with Frerin but that was when I was actually showing,” you argue.

Thorin places his paws on your belly and starts licking it. You smile, rubbing his head before scooping him up and making your way to the kitchen to make breakfast.

You hear the door slam open and then close quietly.

Oh no.

The last time that happened, Frerin brought home five cats.

You whip around and Frerin, not expecting it, stops his trek to his room, looking at you like a deer caught in headlights.

You see a slight lump in his tunic and all six cats (why Kili and Fili were here so early in the morning you didn’t know) right behind him, looking at him curiously.

“Show it to me,” you say sternly. Frerin sighs and walks into the living room and everyone follows.

He takes a seat on the floor, opens his tunic and up pops a pup.

The cats hiss at it and they wince as you clap your hands, a sign that’s telling them to be quiet. Balin and Gandalf climb onto the sofa and Kili, Fili, Thorin and Dwalin are all sitting in front of Frerin, looking at the little husky critically.

“Oh my. Why, frerin?” you ask as you join him on the carpet. The husky comes running over to you and you rub behind its ear earning a growl from Thorin.

“He was following me everywhere and look at him. He’s so thin,” Frerin complains and he’s right.

The little husky was underweight and it looks like it hadn’t eaten properly in weeks, but he was so happy. He leaps on you and you giggle as he licks your face. Thorin immediately swipes at him and the dog whimpers and runs back to Frerin.

You slap Thorin’s head in retaliation.

“You’re a bad cat!” you scold and immediately, his ears drop and his eyes widen.

“No! Don’t give me that look Thorin! You don’t swipe at him, ever.”

Thorin submissively lies down and looks up at you with those round, blue eyes of his.

You huff, holding out your hand to the pup.

His tail starts wiggling excitedly and he makes his way over to you, making sure to keep on eye on Thorin.

When he finally reaches you, you smile and scratch behind his ear.

“Why don’t you give him a bath and I’ll try to find something to feed him,” you suggest and Frerin nods before grabbing the husky and walking away.

You turn your attention back to Thorin and he looks absolutely heartbroken.

He makes eye contact with you before slowly putting his head on the other side of his body, away from you. You roll your eyes.

Thorin might be jealous now, but just wait until he finds out that you plan on keeping the husky.

 


	15. A Little Insight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little insight to what goes on when you leave the room. Italics are conversations between the animals.

Thorin watches the new husky from his spot on the fireplace.

He absolutely loathed the little dog because he now took up all of your and Frerin’s attention. It had only been a day since the husky, named Leo, came into your lives but Thorin didn’t like it one bit.

Leo runs around chasing Fili and Kili as Frerin watches from his spot on the couch. Thorin just pouts and lays down as he watches his son not pay any attention to him.

“ _Jealous much?_ ” Dwalin says, leaping up to join Thorin.

Frerin looks at him curiously before turning back to the dog.

Thorin found it annoying how the cats could understand each other, but you and Frerin could not understand a word they were saying.

“ _I am not jealous. The dog is just very annoying_ ,” Thorin meows back and Leo skids to a stop, looking at Thorin with wide, puppy dog eyes.

“ _Oh so you CAN understand me_ ,” Thorin says, narrowing his eyes at the dog.

“ _All animals can understand each other_ ,” Leo replies and Frerin goes to scratch behind his ears.

“Don’t bark at Adad, Leo. He might not let me keep you when he’s back to his normal self,” Frerin scolds.

“ _As if your mother would let me_ ,” Thorin says and Leo just keeps running around.

“ _You know that’s never going to happen. You’re going to probably keep the mutt until it dies of old age_ ,” Dwalin tells him.

Thorin sighs.

He knew you had a soft spot for animals and he was pretty sure that’s where Frerin got it from. You swore you never brought in stray animals, but he knew that you always brought them in when he went off to his duties and left before he came back. IT was obvious when his sheets smelt like dog.

_“How does the babe fare?”_

_“She wouldn’t let me measure it.”_ Thorin huffs and Dwalin laughs.

_“Well she is only-,”_

_”Seven and a half weeks pregnant. Yes I know, thanks,”_ Thorin growls.

The growl turns into a snicker as Fili headbutts the couch after very skilfull maneuvering from Leo.

 _“You’re such an idiot,”_ Thorin voices.

“ _You’re the one that raised me so if anything I got my idiocy from you,”_ Fili snarks back, shaking his head.

Leo leaps onto the couch and lays on Frerin’s lap.

 _“Do you always argue?”_ Leo ask.

 _“Well technically, Kili and I don’t live here, so no and technically we’re not cats,”_ Fili replies back, pouncing on Kili who was taking a short break.

_“What do you mean you’re not cats?”_

_“We were turned into cats by Gandalf,”_ Kili inputs.

 _“I did no such thing,”_ Gandalf huffs strolling into the room, _“it was Thorin’s son that turned us into cats.”_

 _“Are you trying to place all of this blame on Frerin?”_ Thorin asks, hopping down from the fireplace.

 _“Not all. Just some.”_ Gandalf replies, jumping on the couch to join Frerin and Leo.

 _“Well, if you hadn’t left your staff lying about we wouldn’t have been in this mess now would we?”_ Thorin asks.

 _“I don’t see the problem,”_ Kili adds hopping on Fili, _“I quite like being cats. No responsibilities and cuddles front Auntie, Amad, and Frerin feel so nice._ ”

Kili stretches and Dwalin pounces on him.

 _“You forget that both you and Thorin’s wives are currently pregnant and Tauriel is due to give birth before the month is up,_ ” Dwalin says, biting his ear.

Kili gets loose and swipes at Dwalin.

_“I did not forget that my wife, who is currently in Mirkwood a hundred miles away, is pregnant. I would never forget but we all got put into this shitty situation and have to make the best of it and if you and Uncle are going to be jerks about it I’ll just tell y/n where you’re keeping her surprise.”_

Thorin growls.

_“You wouldn’t dare.”_

_“I would and when we become human, I’ll tell her exactly how much research you went through to find out how you could turn her, Thranduil, and Bard into a cat and that you’ve hidden her favorite knickers under Frerin’s bed,”_ Kili replies as the door opens.

You smile at the your little farm of animals.

Thorin looks like he’s glaring daggers at Kili, Gandalf was perched on top of Leo, Fili and Dwalin were circling each other and Kili was looking back at Thorin smugly. You wondered what happened today.


	16. Trip To Mirkwood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel is about to pop.

You slam the door open causing all six cats to jump two feet in the air. Frerin just raises his brows at you.

“Kili, your wife is about to give birth so I suggest you come with me. Your mother is getting a few ponies ready. Frerin, Mr. Bilbo will be taking care of you and the cats,” you say, gathering your things.

“Meow.”

“No Thorin. You need to stay here. Carrying Kili is a problem enough as it is,” you say, ignoring your husband.

“Amad. You might as well take him. Tauriel is just as important to him as she is to you. She is family and knowing Fili, he won’t want to leave Kili alone to deal with this,” Frerin tries and you look at the three cats that are waiting for you at the door.

You sigh and shake your head, opening the door.

“I will try to be back soon. Don’t get in too much trouble,” you say and all four cats run out.

Wait. Four?!

“Dwalin!” You cry out and he turns, giving you a little meow, before sprinting to the entrance.

What a sight it made to see the queen running after four cats. A story to be told for the years to come.

With your horse at a full trot, it takes an hour to get to Mirkwood.

Thranduil and Legolas greet you at the entrance.

“She’s been requesting her husband for the past hour,” Legolas says, raising his brows as he notices that Kili was not around.

“Funny story, brother. Her husband along with her brother in law and uncle in law got turned into cats,” you say as you are lead to wherever Tauriel is.

“Who am I carrying exactly?” you hear and you turn to find Thranduil with a cat in his arms. Your husband to be exact. You giggle.

“That is Thorin. Thorin and Fili liked to be carried,” you explain as Kili goes running off with Fili right behind him.

“Do they know where they’re going?” Dis asks, quite concerned that her kittens might be lost.

“They should. Tauriel usually stays in her old quarters when they visit,” you say.

“I still can’t believe that your husband is a cat and is currently being held by father,” Legolas says and you giggle as Thorin hisses.

The four of you make your way to Tauriel’s quarters quickly and you burst into the room to find Kili pacing with Fili on the night stand.

“Why are there cats in my room? Why is my husband not here, y/n?” Tauriel panics as other elves start bustling around. Kili starts meowing loudly, Fili starts meowing back, and it’s just one big loud mess.

“Kili! Shut your yapping!” you exclaim, but he does not and continues to do so leaving Tauriel completely confused.

“What-?”

Suddenly you hear a poof and there, in his human form, was Kili with tears streaming down his face. He looks at himself in surprise before quickly making his way over to Tauriel, kissing her forehead in the process.

“Did you just-,”

“Now is not the time, amralime. Our baby is about to grace the world,” Kili says, squeezing her hand and you look at Fili, who looks absolutely confused.

“This is going to be a long day,” you say, before joining in to help.

-

Six hours later, the world is blessed with Vali, the first son child of Kili and Tauriel.

After getting rid of the old sheets, the cats decided to make a new home on Tauriel’s bed with Fili eagerly rubbing himself against Kili, who confused you the most. How the hell did he turn back to his human form? Was it because he was in a stressful situation? Or was he wishing on it so hard that his wish came true?

“You’re glaring,” Kili states and that brings you out of your stupor.

“I am just curious as to how you were turned back to a dwarf,” you say, sitting up as Thorin comes to rest on your lap.

“I don’t know. I just kept praying to the valar that I would be a dwarf again and here I am,” Kili says nonchalantly, using his thumb to tickle little Vali. The baby lets out a tiny little giggle and you can feel your heart jump at the sound.

“I can still feel some cat like tendencies, though so I don’t think I am completely back to my dwarf self yet. Like I can understand what Dwalin and Fili are talking about right now,” Kili explains and Dwalin and Fili look up at him, mortified.

“They’re arguing on whether or not Vali will take up bow and arrows like his parents or just stick to swords.”

You roll your eyes at the two cats. Not even an hour into this world and they were already planning on training Vali.

“None of that here,” Dis interrupts, standing, “come. Let us leave them to their rest. IT has been a long day.”

Following her orders, you all leave, but not before you place a kiss on all of their foreheads.

“It is good to have you back, Kili. Congrats on bringing a wonderful joy in this world,” you say, before closing the door behind you.

 


	17. The Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baby Vali.

Watching Kili and Tauriel with Vali made your heart warm. You missed those days when Frerin was just a baby and you were really excited to have another one on the way.

“So you’ve been a cat for the past two and a half weeks?” Tauriel asks as she nurses Vali.

It was currently only you, her, and Kili in the room. Dis had to keep Thorin, Dwalin, and Fili out which is why she was not in the room.

“Weird story right?” Kili says, pressing a kiss to Vali’s forehead.

“How does the babe fare? It is a month early if I’m not mistaken,” you ask.

Tauriel smiles at you.

“He is healthy and well. Would you like to hold him?”

“Can I?” You ask, standing and walking over to her. You grab little Vali gently.

“Auntie needs to get into the habit again,” Kili says and Tauriel smiles at you.

“Are you expecting again?”

You nod, cooing gently.

There is a knock on the door and Dis’ voice filters through.

“Is it alright if the cats come in? I would quite like to see my grandson and the cats are annoying- ow! Thorin I swear to mahal I’m going to step on you.”

You all laugh and Tauriel tells them to come in. Fili immediately sets out for the bed, looking around for the baby. He stops what he’s doing and looks at you as you take a seat on your chair. Jumping off of the bed, he sits in front you.

“Meow.”

“He wants to sit in your lap so he can see his nephew properly,” Kili says and you scoot back a bit so that Fili has room to jump on your lap. Laying his paws on your arm, he watches Vali as he rocks back and forth.

“Meow.”

“Uncle wants twins,” Kili says with a chuckle.

“Any child would be a blessing.”

“Meow.”

“Dwalin says you two need to be more active,” Kili responds and you glare at the cat in question. He just hisses and digs his claws into Kili gaining a yelp.

You smile at Dis as she comes over.

“May I?” She asks, eyes shining brightly.

You nod and pass him over. Dis finds a seat on the rocking chair and you pet Fili as he snuggles into you.

“Fili you better get on it,” you whisper and he just lets out a long meow. You look at Kili for a translation and he’s smiling.

“He says as soon as he’s back to being a dwarf, he’s going to ask Renicia to court him. Uncle already approves,” Kili states and Thorin meows, jumping on Dis’ lap, looking at his nephew.

“Explaining to the dam that fili was a cat will be the best part of it,” you say.

Everyone laughs.

“When will you be leaving?” Kili asks.

“Tomorrow morning, first light. Our kingdom is king and queen less at the moment and people have begun to ask questions and I cannot have that.”

“Will you be returning as well, amad?” Kili asks, looking at his mother.

“I will not. Its is only your aunt and Thorin and Dwalin that will be returning.” Dis explains as Fili jumps out of your lap and onto his mother, sitting on Thorin and watching his nephew squirm around.

Dwalin joins you instead and you scratch behind his ear.

“Did we really look like that?” Kili asks.

“Oh yeah. It’s quite humorous really and absolutely adorable,” you say.

“Oh did you know that we could understand Leo too?”

“Leo?” Dis and Tauriel asks.

“Our new dog.”

“That Thorin hates,” Kili inputs and Thorin meows multiple times looking at you.

“He says that if you weren’t such an animal lover, then that dog would’ve been out of the house yesterday. He would rather not have the sheets smelling like dog again.”

You couldn’t believe it. You were getting scolded by your husband who was currently a cat. Could life get any more weirder?

 


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kili has a beard.

“They don’t want to leave,” Kili states as you pass Váli back to his parents.

You came to their chambers to say goodbye, but apparently the cats had other plans.

“And I don’t want you to leave either,” he mumbles.

You turn to look at him and he looks a bit sad and was currently trying to avoid your gaze by playing with Váli.

“Kee-,”

Before you can say anything else, you are interrupted by a knock on the door and you open it to find Feren with a note. He looks a bit disgruntled and you were curious as to why.

“A raven from Lord Dain,” he grits out and you snort.

Dain’s raven’s were known to attack elves. You experienced it first hand.

Taking the note, you thank Feren and he takes his leave.

“Why would Dain send a raven? I just spoke to him five days ago,” you questions opening said letter.

_“Lady Dis has informed me of the rather unfortunate events that happened to Thorin and the rest of the dwarves. I came as soon as I could, but you were not here. Luckily Frerin explained to me your whereabouts. I will be on the throne until Thorin gets… better. I know it must be taking a toll on you so I will relieve you of your stress. Also, I sent Frerin with two of my guards, the two cats and Bilbo. I requested that two elves be at the entrance as well seeing as the forest is more dangerous. They should be there soon. Tell Kili and Tauriel that I send my congratulations. See you soon treeshagger. -Lord Dain”_

It seemed that Dain always knew when to save your ass.

“Well thanks to your mother, we’re staying,” you say, throwing the letter into the fire place.

“Really?”

“Really. Frerin, Bilbo, Balin, and Gandalf shall be joining us shortly and Dain sends his love,” you reply, taking a seat and letting Fili jump into your lap.

“If we are going to be so crowded I suggest we move you to larger chambers,” you say, picking Fili up and stranding.

“We’ll be back,” you say and fili meows.

Kili snorts but you just ignore him.

Making your way through Mirkwood, you come to a stop as you realize something.

“He has a beard.”

Fili looks up at you confused.

“Meow.”

“Kili! He has a full beard!”

You immediately turn back and walk to their chambers again.

Pushing the door open, you look at Kili and sure enough, he has a thick beard. Thicker than Thorin’s and his hair got more thicker and wavier. The hell.

“Auntie-?”

“Beard! You have a beard!” You exclaim and Fili meows excitedly, jumping out of your arms and running to the bed.

Dwalin and Thorin join him and all three cats begin pawing at his beard and Kili looks absolutely terrified and confused at the same time.

“Auntie I don’t like this,” kili complains and you giggle before making your way over to Kili, plucking Dwalin and Thorin from Kili’s beard.

“You will have time to feel his beard later. Right now you’re creeping him out,” you say and Thorin just meows still trying to get a look at Kili over your shoulder.

“I didn’t even realize that I had a beard. Fee stop,” Kili says, pushing Fili away.

Fili turns his attention back Vali.

“I didn’t either until I was halfway down the hall. Speaking of, I’m going to ask daddy for an upgrade,” you say causing everyone to laugh.

You smile, making your way to the throne room with Thorin and Dwalin perched on your shoulders. Well, Thorin was on your shoulders, Dwalin was sitting on your shoulders but his upper half was resting on your head. Very uncomfortable.

They hiss at every elf you pass until you reach the throne room. When you get there, they both hop off and make their way up the stairs to the throne gaining a raised brow from Thranduil.

Thorin sits on Thranduil’s arm rest, looking down at you and Dwalin sits on the platform.

Thranduil gives you a questioning look but you just shrug at the weirdos.

 


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You go off on the cats sort of

Thorin watches Vali, purring contently.

He was very happy for his nephew and niece. To have a child is such an amazing experience and he was glad that they finally had a little bundle of joy for themselves. Like you and Thorin, Tauriel and Kili had a difficult time producing children and it was very heartbreaking for them but they kept on trying and here they were with the current future heir to the throne.

“ _ **Why do you think Kili’s hair grew so quickly? He was as bare as a baby before we were cats,**_ ” Dwalin asks lying down next to Thorin at the foot of the bed.

“You guys realize I can still understand you right?” Kili asks irritably.

“ ** _Mind your own_** ,” Dwalin replies glaring at Kili,  ** _“Do you think my mohawk will grow back?”_**

Thorin scoffs.

 ** _“You’d look stupid if it did.”_**

**_“I looked quite handsome with it on,”_** Dwalin huffs. 

“Now that’s a load of cow manure,” Kili laughs. 

**“** _ **I think we would all prefer your head to not have any hair** ,” _Thorin responds. 

“Lest you scare all the children away,” Kili retorts and Dwalin hisses in his direction. 

“My husband is talking to a cat. It’s official I have seen everything,” Tauriel states and that causes everyone in the room to laugh.

You kindly asked Thranduil for larger chambers and he had given it without complaint. The room was large enough to fit 40 people with the furniture which was good given the fact that Bilbo and Frerin had arrived shortly after Tauriel was moved. You were surprised to see 10 eleven guards with them rather than the two that was asked. You supposed your father did like to go overboard sometimes.

“Well you haven’t seen it all until you’ve seen Thorin fall into the toilet,” you say with a giggle, catching Fili as he leaps at you.

“ ** _The toilet seat was already when which is why I slipped_** ,” Thorin grumbles.

“ ** _Yeah and I like elves_** ,” Dwalin scoffs sarcastically and Kili laughs.

“Uncles trying to defend himself and Dwalin’s shooting him down,” Kili says.

“I still can’t believe you’re back to being a dwarf. What the fuck?” Frerin asks and that sparks something within you.

Holding fili close so he won’t run off, you walk over to pull Kili’s ear.

“Ow!”

“You’ve been teaching him swear words haven’t you?”

“What?! Ow! No auntie! I swear it isn’t us! It’s Dwalin!”

Letting go of Kili and Fili, you lunge for Dwalin as he tries to make a quick escape. Grabbing him by his neck, you turn him to face you.

“ ** _It was an accident!_** ”

“What do you mean accident? Haven’t you ever heard of not swearing around children?”

“ ** _I didn’t know he was there! Besides, he’s old enough to be learning swear words! He’s part human!_** ”

“He may be part human but he is also part dwarf and part elf. Dwarves don’t reach maturity until their forties and elves don’t reach maturity until their fifties! So he is still a kid!” you snap and that earns a chuckle from Kili.

“What’s so funny?”

“The fact that you’re have a conversation with a cat and it is pretty much one hundred percent accurate,” Kili states and you huff before turning back to Dwalin.

You narrow your eyes at him and he narrows his eyes back, still dangling from your hand.

“Don’t let it happen again,” you say and you put him back down and he goes hiding behind Thorin.

“ ** _That lass can be scary when she wants to be_** ,” Dwalin mumbles, licking his paws as you turn back to sit in your chair.

“I heard that!”

Dwalin bristles and looks at Thorin. Thorin just laughs.

 


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> VERY SHORT You begin to wonder what will happen after everything.

The days till Thorin, Dwalin, Fili, Gandalf, and Balin were turned back to actually people was getting shorter and shorter. Radagast had sent word this morning that he should be there in a week and you were excited. Sure the cats were very cute, but you missed your husband.

Speaking of, you had no idea where he or Frerin was. The other cats were in their chambers. Why your father had to give each cat their own room was beyond you.

Making your way to the training area, you pause in the doorway as you watch your father teach Frerin how to use a bow. Thorin was calmly perched on his shoulders and he was taking it all in stride.

“Relax a bit. You’re too wound up. If you pull any harder, you’re going to break the string.”

“Meow.”

“Are you an elf? I don’t think so,” Thranduil snaps. Thorin hisses.

You giggle and that cause Frerin to miss his target.

“Amad!” Frerin groans and you laugh walking into the room.

“I’m sorry but your grandfather is currently arguing with a cat. How is that not funny?” You ask, pressing a kiss to his cheek. He groans and wipes his cheek.

“If your husband hadn’t joined me, I wouldn’t be arguing with a cat,” Thranduil huffs.

“Meow!”

“Are you saying that I don’t know how to teach my grandson to shoot a bow?”

“Meow!”

“I don’t see you carrying a bow around!”

You grab Thorin off of Thranduil’s shoulders.

“That’s enough the both of you. If you can’t teach Frerin how to shoot a bow without arguing I’ll ask Legolas to teach you without your presence,” you snap.

They both just huff. Thorin rests his paws in your shoulders before giving your ear a lick. You giggle a bit.

“Kisses aren’t going to make me change my mind,” you reply before putting him on the ground. He immediately jumps right back on Thranduil’s shoulder. How he managed to jump 6’5” in the air amazed you.

You take a seat on one of the benches, watching your father interact with Frerin with Thorin on top of his shoulders.

You couldn’t help, but wonder how different everything was going to be when they were back to being Cats. Was Thorin still going to hold a slight grudge over Thranduil? Were they going to pretend none of this ever happened?

All these thoughts go through your head and you fail to notice Legolas until he takes a seat next to you.

“What troubles you, muinthel?”

“Nothing, muindor. Just thinking about everything after that comes after. Thorin had been missing for month and I have only been doing his duties for half of that meaning that he has a lot to catch up on and apologies to be made. It is going to take a toll on him. And the relationship between father and Thorin. Will it stay the same or will it go back to them being on edge around each other?”

“Y/n. Thorin is currently sitting on father’s shoulder teaching your son how to shoot a bow and arrow. Nothing is ever going to be the same again. If anything, Dain will handle whatever couldn’t be handled within this past month. You worry too much,” Legolas states.

You let out a sigh.

“I suppose I do.”


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elrond finally meets Frerin.

You really wondered what was taking Radagast so long. He took care of the Mirkwood forest meaning he never left it so why was he taking so long?

“Woof!”

You look down and lift Leo up onto your lap. You didn’t realize that Frerin had brought Leo with him until you caught him and Thorin sitting on Thranduil in the throne room. Leo was in his lap and Thorin on his shoulders. The amount of change he went through was unbelievable. You didn’t think your father was very fond of animals that weren’t elks or horses but there he was with a cat and on a dog on his throne like they owned the place. It was absolutely astounding!

“Hello little one,” you say and he licks your face.

“Meow!” You hear before you are suddenly joined by Thorin on the bed.

“I think we may need a few more pets to keep you company don’t you think?” You ask and Leo let’s out a bark while Thorin lets out a hiss.

You stand as someone knocks on your door and you smile as you see your Ada.

Pulling Elrond into a hug, you press a kiss to his cheek.

“Ada! What are you doing here?” You ask, stepping back.

“Well I am here for our yearly meeting and I just so happened to overhear that you were currently in the kingdom so I thought I’d visit. It’s been years since I’ve last seen you. Your wedding, I would think,” Elrond states as you make room for him to enter.

“Yes I know. I’m sorry but Thorin’s just very protective.”

“Indeed he is,” Elrond replies, looking at Thorin with a raised brow. That makes you confused.

“You know Thorin is a cat?”

“My darling daughter. I have the gift of seeing,” he says and you laugh.

That was just his polite way of saying, “I can see the future dumbass.”

“Of course. Would you like to meet your grandson? He should be somewhere around here,” you say, grabbing your shoes.

You hear a meow, but it is not you that Thorin is tugging on. You watch him curiously as he looks at Lord Elrond. Elrond raises a brow before sighing. Thorin takes that as a sign to jump into his arms.

“No one can resist Thorin’s kitty charms except me apparently,” you giggle.

“Who can say no to this?”

That question causes you to laugh. Apparently elves were not immune to the cuteness of cats even if they’re actually dwarves.

Walking down the hall, you make your way to the training room. Thranduil often put aside his duties to train Frerin, but when he couldn’t Legolas would train him as well. Frerin absolutely loved it. You didn’t want him training at such a young age, but how could you say no to your father.

Walking into the room, You find Kili helping Frerin with his stance and the other cats all lined up, sitting, and watching the events unfold.

“You have an army of cats,” Lord Elrond states as Thorin leaves his arms and takes a seat next to Balin.

“They’re all useless though,” you add and immediately all heads snap towards you.

Thorin lets out a meow before they turn their attention back to Kili and Frerin.

“Uncle said you’re being rude,” Kili says with a laugh and you smile.

“Frerin. Come here for a second,” you say and Frerin puts his bow down and makes his way over to you.

“This is your other grandfather. Lord Elrond of Imladris,” you introduce.

Elrond gives a wide smile.

“You look at exactly like your father with the grace of your mother,” He says and Frerin smiles.

“I gave Thranduil a heart attack when I first met him, but he doesn’t want Adad to know that,” Frerin states slipping easily into elvish. You hear a meow and Kili chuckle.

“Uncle thinks your talking shit.”

“That’s because we are,” you shoot back.

Thorin immediately runs over to you and leaps on Frerin’s shoulder eyeing you and Elrond critically. Elrond scoffs.

“Does he really think he’s intimidating?”

“We’ll just let him think that,” you say and that earns a hiss from Thorin.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whoops

The day was finally here. Radagast had sent word last night that he would be there tomorrow and you were overly excited! You finally get to see your husband again after a month. You were indeed happy, but for some reason there was a strange feeling in your gut. Something you couldn’t place.

Making your way to the throne room, you smile brightly as you see Radagast. You have never been so happy to see a wizard in your life. All of the cats were there including both of your fathers, Frerin, and Legolas.

“Radagast! I am so relieved to see you,” you say, catching Thorin as he makes a leap for you.

“I am so sorry that I’ve been so busy. The darkness that grows doesn’t seem to stop growing,” he responds.

“That’s fine. As long as I finally get to see my husband again,” you say and Thorin meows before licking your face. You were finally going to be reunited.

“Alright. LEt’s get this started shall we?” he asks and you nod.

You see him muttering a few words and your anxiety starts creeping in as the smoke around Gandalf’s staff starts turning purple. This was not a good sign.

You blink and suddenly, you were not as tall as you remembered and you swear Radagast was not that tall and neither was Thranduil’s throne. Why did you feel so fluffy?

You look at Thorin.

“Are you okay?” he asks and it’s then that you realize. You were turned into a cat. Oh no.

-

Pacing for the tenth time, you curse that old wizard. Instead of turning your family back into dwarves, he turned every person in that room into cats! For Mahal’s sake!

Looking up as you hear footsteps, you immediately jump into Kili’s awaiting arms.

“Kili! We’re cats,” you complain and he chuckles.

“It’s not as fun as it looks, is it?” he asks and you have half a mind to swipe at him.

“Am I at least a pretty cat?” you ask, hopefully.

Elrond was turned into a Bombay cat, Thranduil was turned into a Savannah cat, Legolas a Dragon Li and Frerin into a Maine Coon cat. You really wanted to know if you got out lucky as well.

“A very pretty cat indeed. A ragdoll cat if I’m not mistaken,” Kili responds and you let out a sigh.

“Thank goodness. I don’t think I could live if I was a sphynx cat,” you say and Kili lets out another laugh.

“I could shave your hair off,” Kili jokes and you hiss.

“And I could tell Thorin why his trousers were stuck to his throne and he had to walk around ass bared,” you threaten.

“You what?” Thorin snaps.

“Aunty! You promised!” Kili whines.

“Well that was before you threatened to shave my coat,” you say, flicking his face with your tail before jumping out of his arms.

“So if you can’t fix this than what are we to do?” Kili asks, looking at Radagast who looked deeply apologetic.

“I’m sorry to have to say this, but I must see Saruman. He is the greatest of our order and he may be the only one to fix this.”

That makes you sigh. Not this shit again.

You pad over to Thorin and lay next to him. He nudges you with his nose and you look at him.

“Isn’t this what you wanted? To be together again?” he asks.

“As people! Not cats!”

He laughs as Frerin comes padding over.

“But we’re together so that’s always a plus,” Thorin responds, licking your cheek.

“But for how long are we going to stay as cats because if my son or daughter comes out while I’m a cat, I’m going to be so mad,” you huff as Frerin lies next to you.

“We’ll just have to wait and see,” Thorin says, before snuggling closer. Here you were, as a cat, snuggled between your two boys and you couldn’t be happier despite the circumstances.

 


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re not happy

You ignore Thorin who was currently trying to get your attention by licking your face. You were sulking, that much was obvious, but I mean who wouldn’t be after they were turned into a cat? You kind of understood what the others were feeling now but still.

“Come on love,” Thorin says, moving to kick your ear.

“No,” you huff out indignantly.

“Stop sulking. It’s not healthy for the baby,” he tries again and you huff again.

“How would you know?”

“I can hear him meowing.”

That causes you to swipe at him but he avoids it by jumping into the floor.

“Not funny, Thorin.” You say, turning away from him.

“But it is,” he says, joining you on your bed.

“I’m a cat,” you cry out and he licks your face again.

“I know but like Kili once said: we don’t know how long we’re going to be in this situation so we might as well make the best of it,” he responds and you looking at him, before reaching out to lick his face as well.

“There’s my girl,” he says and you rub against him, “now lets go look for our son. I’m sure he’s causing some type of trouble with Fili somewhere.”

The both of you jump off of your bed to go explore the city.

-

Walking into the training room you find everyone there including Dis and Kili. You understood why Thorin wanted to be carried so much. The walk was even longer! You walk up to your sister in law, jumping straight into her arms.

“Who might this be?” Dis asks petting you.

“That’s y/n,” Kili says.

“Dis help me. I’m a cat!” You complain, slumping against her.

Kili laughs.

“She doesn’t like being a cat,” Kili says and Dis laughs as well before rubbing your back.

“I’m sorry that there’s nothing we can do about it. Radagast left this morning so who knows how long we’ll have to wait again,” she says making you whine.

“How do you think the babe is fairing?” Kili asks.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” you respond.

You really needed to know how this all worked out. Was it currently a kitten as well and will it turn back to being a human with you. God you hoped so.

“Amad, look what I can do!” You hear and you turn to find Frerin looking at you.

Knowing that he has your attention, he begins running around and jumping, knocking over all the cats and that causes you to laugh.

“Oh my. Frerin is a such a funny little thing isn’t he?” Dis asks, laughing.

“He’s going to be dead soon,” Dwalin growls, standing up.

Before you can even move, Thranduil and Elrond stand in front of Frerin who was currently cowering behind them.

“Lay a finger on him and I’ll scratch your eyes out,” Thranduil states and you roll your eyes. Your father didn’t seem to realize that it was all just a joke.

“We’re on even grounds now, pompous elf,” Dwalin states before tackling Thranduil to the ground. You roll your eyes and go back to lying in Dis’ arm as Kili goes over to break up the cat fight.

“You know, I really hope you don’t give birth inthis form,” Dis states running her hand along your belly which was pretty damn soothing if you do say so yourself.

“Aren’t we all?” Kili asks, bringing over a thoroughly pissed of Thranduil.

You nip Dis lightly, not liking the fact that she was currently trying to take the Mickey out of you. She just laughs in return.

Leaping down from her arms, you quietly sneak over to Thorin. His back was currently facing you and he was having a very in depth conversation with Balin which gave you a perfect opportunity to-

“Boo!” You shout, pouncing on his back and he scrambles away, knocking over Elrond and Fili in the process. Who knew your husband was such a scaredy cat?

You hear Kili and Dis laugh and you smile at your accomplished mission.

The door opens and shuts to reveal Bilbo and you pad over to him, sitting down first as if asking permission to be carried. He bends over a bit and that’s all you need to jump into his arms. You run your face against his and he lets out a laugh.

“I am still in awe at the fact that Lord Elrond, Thranduil, and Thorin are all cats,” Bilbo says, taking a seat next to Dis.

“That’s like half of the current rulers of Middle Earth,” Kili states as you lay in Bilbo’s lap.

“I feel like this is just a dream that we’ll wake from at any moment,” Bilbo states.

You watch Frerin and Legolas. Those two were currently under a helmet and moving closer to Dwalin who seemed none the wiser. They both move together, stopping as Dwalin turns to look at them as if wondering why a helmet was moving closer to him.

Suddenly, the both of them jump out of the helmet and Dwalin lets out a yelp while jumping two feet in the air.

After realizing that it was just Legolas and Frerin, he chases after them yelling, “I’ll get you back you damn tree-shaggers.”

This was definitely going to be fun.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Line of Durin? More like Line of Idiots

You lay at the foot of the bed next to Tauriel. She was currently nursing Vali and you were just happy to be near your nephew.

“I think now I’ve seen it all,” Tauriel mutters.

“You’re telling me,” you respond but you know she doesn’t understand you.

You watch Fili in the distance and you perk up as you see him sniffing around Kili’s boots.

“You’re going to regret that,” you say, but Fili ignores you, continuing his sniffing.

He slowly moves his head into the boot and he tries to get out but it snags on his head and he begins panicking. You watch in amusement as he frantically moves around with Kili trying to help him. Every time Kili comes close to catching him, he unknowingly moves out of the way. Suddenly, he drops to the ground. The stench must’ve knocked him out.

“I raised a bunch of idiots,” Thorin says, climbing up next to you as Kili removes the boot from Fili’s head and poking his face.

“I came out pretty normal if I do say so myself,” Frerin adds, joining you as well.

“That’s because you came from me. I had a much higher responsibility with you,” Thorin replies.

“I’m beginning to think you don’t love us,” Kili says, picking Fili up and taking a seat on the chair.

“I don’t,” Thorin retorts making Kili pout.

“I love you Kee! Don’t let Mr. Grumpy Cat get you down,” you say and Thorin just rolls his eyes, resting his head on yours.

“Thanks Auntie. Just for that I’ll let you know where your favorite underwear is,” he responds and Thorin snaps his head to him and you tilt your head to the side.

“What do you mean? I thought I accidentally threw them out?”

“Oh no. Uncle’s been hiding them from you. He’s mad that you don’t wear any of his clothes but always wears the clothes Amad gifts you,” Kili says with a smirk on his face as Fili finally comes to.

You slowly turn to glare at Thorin and he sits up before looking away from you in a haughty manner.

“I have no idea what he’s talking about. I did no such thing.”

Frerin snorts and you sit up, glaring at Thorin.

“Kili. Where did you put those presents?” You ask, still looking at Thorin. He immediately snaps his head towards Kili.

“They’re in Frerin’s room. In his bottom drawer,” Kili says, giving Thorin a smirk.

“Little Weasel,” Thorin grumbles, saying louder, “it’s not like it matters. We will be back to our old selves by the time we return to Erebor.”

“What happened?” Fili asks groggily, finally sitting up.

“You’re an idiot, that’s what,” Thorin huffs, blundering over to lick your face. You just sigh. You could be mad at your dwarf later.

“Why did I pass out?”

“Because Kili’s feet stinks and you’re an idiot. End of story,” Thorin repeats.

“Says the cat that walked off the walkway,” Fili huffs and you place a paw on Thorin’s head effectively stopping him from his grooming of you.

“You what?”

“Uncles an idiot and went running around the corner forgetting that he actually had to turn and went running straight off of the walkway. Luckily the walkway below was wider and that Dori just so happened to be walking by and carrying a basket of yarn as he was walkin. He got out extremely lucky,” Kili exclaims shaking his head.

“You’re all Idiots, I swear. How you’ve been surviving these past couple of weeks surprises me,” you mutter.

“It can’t be as bad as Dwalin though. He actually took a tumble down the stairs. Twice,” Kili says laughing and you frown.

“A bunch of idiots. The Line of Durin is filled with a bunch of idiots,” you complain slumping down into Frerin.

“Are you calling our son an idiot,” Thorin asks, looking at you.

“No because he’s more human and elf than he is dwarf so he didn’t get your stupidity,” you huff causing Frerin to laugh.

“I’m going to take a stab and say that y/n has finally found out about what you guys been doing as cats and isn’t too pleased,” Tauriel states.

“More or less,” Kili states as you push Thorin away from you, causing him to fall off the bed.

“Rude,” Thorin replies before leaving to find someone who will like his attention.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saruman arrives.

“Where’s Thorin?” You ask, walking into the training room. You really had no idea why everyone kept coming here. You couldn’t do anything since you were all cats.

The dwarf in question pops his head out of a pot. What he was doing in there you had no idea. He was a weirdo sometimes. He jumps out, trailing dirt behind him. He comes to nuzzle you but you place a paw on his forehead.

“Not while you’re dirty,” is all you say before turning towards everyone. Leo and Frerin were currently chasing Fili around and you laugh as, after some very careful maneuvering from Leo and Frerin, Fili runs into the same exact pot that Thorin had just come out of, breaking it.

“Idiots. A bunch of idiots,” Thorin says, shaking his head.

“Saruman is here and is waiting for us in the throne room,” you announce and everyone stops what they’re doing.

“Is he really?” Dwalin asks.

“Are we finally going to be back to our normal selves?” Fili asks pouncing on Frerin finally.

“Yes. Let’s just hope.”

-

You walk into the throne room with Thorin by your side and for some reason you bristle as you make eye contact with the white wizard. Bilbo, Dis, and Radagast were standing beside him and Bilbo looked abbot nervous.

Leo lets out a whine and hides behind Thorin as he sees Saruman.

“What’s wrong?” Thorin asks him, sitting up straighter.

“I don’t like him,” Leo complains and you give him a lick before walking closer to the wizard.

“Are they all here then?” Saruman asks and Bilbo nods after counting all the cats.

“Let us get started.”

You hear him speaking but you can’t comprehend the words as your head gets cloudy and suddenly you are in a heap on the floor, passed out.

-

When you wake up, you don’t feel as small as you remember but you also feel something or someone licking your face. Oh no? Does that mean that some weren’t turned back to dwarves? You shoot up and immediately regret it as you knock heads with Thorin.

Wait a minute!

“Thorin!” You cry out, wrapping your arms around his neck. He lets out a chuckle pulling you into his lap. You let out a sob. It was so nice to be in his arms after so long. You missed him dearly.

You pepper his face with kisses and you pull back as you realize something. He had a longer beard. Not too long, but maybe  about the length of his chest. You didn’t like it but you weren’t going to voice it.

You finally press a kiss to his lips, relishing the feeling. You pull back and rest your forehead on his, closing your eyes.

“I missed you meleth nin.”

“And I missed you amralime,” he whispers back.

Looking around and everyone was back to normal except there was an extra person and a few more unexpected animals.

“Why are there cats? And who are you?” You ask, standing.

Looking at the teenager, he seemed a bit familiar.

He looked to be Frerin’s age with black hair and blue eyes that looked exactly like-

“Leo?” you ask and he nods, still looking at his hands.

“It seems that while I turned you back into your former selves, the cat forms still stayed. It was kind of like your souls were sucked out of the cats’ bodies and it reformed into your human bodies. Or dwarf bodies, rather,” Saruman explains as a cat comes pawing at you. This one is Thorin. Or at least, he was Thorin.

You pick him up.

“What are we supposed to do with nine cats and a dog?” you ask as you hear dog Leo barking, “and an extra human?”

“Anything but give us a way,” the cat in your arms says and you nearly drop it in surprise. You completely forgot about the after effects.

“She wouldn’t give us away would she?” you hear and this time is your cat that’s speaking.

“She probably will. She seems the type,” Thorin-cat adds.

“Don’t be rude or I will give you away,” you snap and the cat looks at you in surprise.

“You can understand us?”

“Of course I can and I have half a mind to give you all away thanks to your comment,” you reply.

“I only jest,” he says, licking your face and you roll your eyes, looking to your husband.

“Thorin. What are we going to do?”


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You sort out what to do with everyone.

“We can’t just give him away, Thorin! In case you haven’t noticed, he’s a human now. Not a dog!”

It had only been a day since you were back to normal, but you and Thorin had already gotten into an argument. You really needed to do something about Leo. You couldn’t put him on the streets and you didn’t want to find him a family. You wanted to keep him as your own son, but Thorin had other ideas.

“He is a human, y/n!” Thorin snaps, oblivious to the fact that Frerin and Leo were currently sat outside of their chamber doors.

“Don’t give me this race crap, Thorin! You married a half-human, half-elf and you’re currently raising a child who has part human, elf, and dwarf!” you snap back.

Frerin looks at Leo, but the dog turned man was just staring at the ground. He really didn’t want this. He just wanted to be back to his carefree dog life.

“I am not talking about his race, y/n! I’m talking about his life-span. I would love to take him as our own, but it will bring us nothing but heartbreak because he will die before us. You may not be immortal anymore, but you are still able to live a longer life than the regular human and even I might be able to outlive him. Can’t you see that if we take this human as ours we will only die of a heartbreak,” Thorin explains, reaching out to clasp your hands in his.

“But. We can’t just give him to another human. You don’t abandon someone simply because you can’t stand the idea of them. I know what that feels like Thorin!” you snap.

This was starting to get personal. The idea of giving Leo away because you couldn’t watch him die was exactly what Thranduil did to you. He gave you away simply because he couldn’t bear to look at you and you weren’t about to do that to him.

Thorin sighs.

You had a point. He had come to care for Leo over the past week that you’ve had him and he really didn’t want to send him away. Thorin sighs.

“Very well. We will not give him to another family, but we must change his name. I can’t call him Leo without thinking of the dog.”

You smile at your husband, pressing a kiss to his cheek. You go to open the door, wanting to tell your son and Leo the exciting news. You step back as the two in question come tumbling in looking a bit sheepish.

“I’m going to take a guess and say you already know what’s about to come?” you ask and they both nod.

“Welcome to the family, amralime.”

-

Now that you dealt with Leo, who was very adamant on keeping his name, you had to deal with the stray cats. You had them all gathered in the training room and you were currently looking around at them.

If you took your former selves, you would have three cats and one dog. That seemed very reasonable to you. To Thorin, however, it wasn’t.

“Why can’t we just get rid of them all? Surely they can fend for themselves,” Thorin grumbles.

“Thorin Oakenshield. You have been a cat for 26 days. Have some decency,” you snap.

“I can’t believe my ears right now,” Thorin grumbles and you roll your eyes.

“They don’t typically fight this much,” You hear Frerin mutter to Leo.

“That’s just because Uncle hasn’t gotten some in nearly a month. You know they missed their monthly ritual. Happens every time Thorin has a meeting with Thranduil and Bard,” Fili mutters and you glare at him as Frerin and Leo gag.

“Keep my sex life out of your business, thanks,” you snap and Fili just laughs.

Thorin shakes his head at him.

“I’m fine with keeping our former selves. Especially since we can understand them now,” Dwalin says, catching his cat appropriately named Soul.

He told you about his axes and you rolled your eyes at his names.

“I hope he brings you dead rats,” Thorin grumbles.

“Better than anything you can give him,” Soul snarks back and you laugh. This was going to be so fun now that you could understand them.

“I already hate your cat, Dwalin,” Thorin says, glaring at the black cat.

“The feeling is mutual bud,” Soul replies and Dwalin lets out a hearty laugh as Sheila leaps into your arms.

“I say we do something special for these kitty cats,” you say, running your hand along Sheila’s fur and knowing that Thorin wasn’t going to be a fan of your suggestion, “a day dedicated to them called Cats Day.”

 


End file.
